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yeah here's "my funny story" i fucked her at her house. her 12 year old sister climbed in through the window because she came home early to get her mobile phone. not good. we got over it 2 weeks later. so we did it on her lounge when absolutely no-one was coming home for at least 4 hours. but...

Just stick your dick in her mouth! and do it twice.

Smoking pot and doing cocaine increases your I.Q by at least 30 points. You feel more energetic, have a higher count of natural protein - and it even promotes hormone growth. You experience larger muscle growth, and your heart becomes larger by expending more oxygen into your muscles and...

the best one hands down "she let me take a dump on her chest and i couldn't resist"

i gave my ex-girlfriend a chilli hotdog what you do is; you take a dump on her chest (newspapers on the bed remember). make sure it's right in the middle of her clevage. then you put her tits together and you tit fuck her. if you are sick and your shit is yellow, you have a mustard effect. if...

i made the mistake of actually being bothered to read your whole post no hard feelings, you're just a really low human being. you spat 3 years of time and effort that he has put up with in his face. i'm happy that he didn't waste any more time on you. don't be too upset though, things could...

the brain.

if i listened to my parents i'd be marrying some boring schmo who would just bore the fuck outta me so much i'd just go cheat on her with venetian curtains or a table chair that's how boring she'd be

Nice Komaticom, I agree with you as well. ;)

perform a blowjob experiment weigh yourself before blowing him off, and then proceed to blow him. swallow his load full, and then weigh yourself again. now it's simple chemistry, to calculate the mass of cum; do your final weight minus your initial weight. now get your other 2 friends to...

i think you're fucked

she must swallow.

invite him to your house to play poke`mon all day.

sex involves a vagina?... ok, this is news to me.

i had a friend fall for me once, and it was really not pretty. i ejaculated in her eye.:bomb:

this one's easy: eat her out. then e-mail me her number

don't kid youself, hurry up and the fuck shit out of her!

work involves cleaning your jizz up after you blow on her favourite top

if she isn't taking anal within a week of going out then i think you must show her the door

just donate them a cumshot to the face it worked in my primary. it worked on my old soccer team. it worked in year 10, and it's going to work for year 12 graduation. don't forget to give credit when due.