Best+Worst of Teacher Quotes and Habits (5 Viewers)

[Aerath]

Our English teacher wanted to write up "English Assessment" on the board on Friday.
She writes on the board:
English Ass
And then her mobile rings.

She takes the phone out of her handbag, and turns it off, and goes back to writing on the board:

English Asses
And then the Deputy Principal walks in.

 

[Aplus]

*Last period bell rings*
Maths teacher: "Alright, I'm sick of seeing your ugly faces. Good day to you, you're free."
*Picks up his stuff and leaves the room. Slams the door shut. Doesn't look back at the room. Just leaves.*

 

[Dare]

Wow. Here's something I can relate to.
My English teacher is constantly saying things that don't seem to go...or come from...anywhere.

There's lots...but, the one I always remember is:

"Everyone has a face...even disabled people...and that's a tragedy for those who don't."

We all just sat there and thought "Wtf."

 

[rokkuguhyo]

but don't you love how the teachers just swear and not really care about it coz we're "older and more mature" lol.

lol yep!!

In SAC, a teacher is giving our class tips onhow to write essays: "Cut the bullshit and get to the point!" =D

 

[risole91]

heaps of teachers swear at my school, in front of the seniors that is.
They talk to us like normal people, its pretty cool.

And you can swear at them and they dont care lol.

 

[michael1990]

heaps of teachers swear at my school, in front of the seniors that is.
They talk to us like normal people, its pretty cool.

And you can swear at them and they dont care lol.

HA HA HA

So true

We get away with so much shit hey Risole.

 

[^CoSMic DoRiS^^]

I'll always remember this one:

One of the English teachers at our school was renowned, in our year at least, for being a bumbling incompetent idiot 90% of the time. We were studying frontline, watching a clip where Mike is wearing a yellow shirt. This teacher was also wearing a yellow shirt that day (his favourite mustard-coloured jumper) and he goes

"So, we see here that Mike, in contrast to [whatever character it was] is simply nothing but a yellow-wearing buffoon."

At least half the room started to laugh and the poor guy was oblivious to what was so funny.

 

[wendybird]

my maths teacher is very funny- she's an acquired taste

quotes: someone else in my class is collecting.

"If you have nothing constructive to do, you can go and wash my car... in the rain..."

"You can't halve three? Of course you can halve three! You can halve anything! I can halve you if I wanted to, it's messy but it can be done!"

"I will pull you out of bed at 3am and ask you the quadratic formula! Instead of Santa coming down the chimney, you'll have someone else coming down the chimney. Tell your parents not to kill me"

"You are here to LEARN, not to drown! If you want to drown, I have better ways of doing that! I'll drown you in homework!"

[Everyone in the class is silent as teacher walks in]
"What are you all up to?"
[Looks up to ceiling to check a bucket of porridge isn't about to fall on her]
"I don't trust you..."

 

[cake-caitlin]

modern history - discussing the russian revolution and peasant farming land


teacher: the germans wanted the russians' arable land. james, what does 'arable' mean?

james: like, luscious?

teacher: i guess... you couldn't really fit that into another context though. ''the land was arable / the land was luscious''. ''she was luscious / she was arable''??

james: you could say ''she was arable'' if she was really fertile.

teacher: yes james, but the idea of ploughing her....



hahaha it was classic

 

[floatinglily]

our physics teacher is a douchebag:
"if it moves, its biology. if it smells, its chemistry. and if it doesnt work, it physics."
roger that, sir.

In Chem:
Teacher: What are some things that explode?
Student: Iraq!

 

[x-kendall-x]

My bio teacher is awesome...

day of parent teacher interviews - our class was being heaps loud and not listening and Mr Smith's just said "remember i'm seeing your parents tonight". that shut us up pretty quick haha.

also - Yr 12 Bio went to Taronga Zoo a couple of weeks ago and stayed over night at the zoo.
At night the boys were mucking around in their room and they had someone watching the door and if Mr Smith came they had to make a bird call for warning.
So this boy makes a bird call because Mr Smith's coming but Smithy hears and he's bursts out with "The only bird call I want to hear tonight is 'Shut the fuck up!'(in a high voice)"
All the boys were stunned.
Then later they put a mobile under Smithy's pillow and rung it. The ringtone was 'girls just want to have fun' and he's just sat up and gone "what the fuck is that?"

He's a champ

 

[kaliber]

If you were cos square theta and i am sine square theta then we will be one!

 

[siddharthlaha]

"French, physics easily mixed up, they both start with P"

 

[ticky2002]

Maths teacher says the following whilst trying check my equation on a calculator:

Where's the minus key??


[had to show her]

 

[Bacilli]

Not really funny but I can remember my biology teacher was mega-racist, especially towards those who used other languages instead of English. For example I remember an Arab kid (Cudule was his name I believe) was talking to one of his mates during class when all of a sudden you heard the teacher scream "You best shut-up boy otherwise Caltex is where you'll be!"

 

[bmxgurl25]

Effort earns Success lol my business teacher has said that many times

 

[advanced sam]

That quote makes more sense than the English syllabus.

well i agree to that

 

[risole91]

Arab kid "You best shut-up boy otherwise Caltex is where you'll be!"

HAHA

 

[xJennax]

Omg this thread made me laugh so much! Love all the quotes.

I have a really funny business studies teacher but I can't remember the exact quotes. =(

 

[ajdlinux]

Our English teacher is a bit clueless. He's Canadian, and he tried to talk to us about politics: "Senators are appointed for life..."

He also seems to think Christmas Island has no food, power or roads, and that we're the only country in the world that detains asylum seekers at all, and that in the US or Canada they'd be welcomed with open arms - neglecting that there are some who aren't genuine, and would be rejected anywhere.

He then goes on to talk about how we need to be aware of the world around us.