Best+Worst of Teacher Quotes and Habits (1 Viewer)

[redherring]

teacher: so, how was the exam.
student: it was sooo long and hard...
teacher: that's what she said

2. student: how's it hanging?
teacher: low, loose and fulla' juice

3. (english teacher to yr 7 student, 1st week at school): "i've flushed better things than you!"

4. student: sir, can we have any hints as to what might appear in the english exam.
teacher: well, i think there might, just might- be a narrative, unseen texts, and 4 essays.

also, our business teacher, to illustrate profitability, used the analogy of a prostitite, who differentiates herself by wearing gucci sunnies to attract more 'customers''- you really had to be there for that one.

 

[rubificticious]

In Maths, there's an equation on the board, and something to do with square rooting the demoninator, or the number on the bottom.
Female student: "So, do we root the bottom?"
Male teacher: "Whatever tickles your fancy."

 

[xox.happy1.xox]

I remember this year, we had an assembly. Lots of people were recieving awards (including myself), and there was this one boy who never reciever awards because he is the joker of the class...
Teacher: That is all the awards, thanks alot.
Boy: Come on Miss, the only award I have ever recieved was in grade 3, and that was for attendance!
LOL.

 

[Annalisee]

My ancient history teacher, "It's okay, I don't expect you to know anything. Just spell Sparta... Backwards."

 

[rubificticious]

My ancient history teacher, "It's okay, I don't expect you to know anything. Just spell Sparta... Backwards."

I don't get it. LOL.

 

[Aplus]

Neither do I.

 

[Sarsy]

lol, my Elective History teacher, during a powerpoint presentation:

"Shut the fuck up or I'll come over there, rip your fucking head off and shit down your neck"

My old English teacher:

"Go up to the front office and tell them you have hypochondria."

Another one. He used to demonstrate multiple choice.
A) Far off answer
B) A little closer answer
C) Very close answer
D) Correct answer

Teacher:"And no, D is not always the right answer"

 

[RedZenith]

Teacher: Science is interesting, and if you don't agree you can fuck off!

plagiarizing dawkins tut tut

 

[kirsty2478]

Discussing genetics in biology:
Teacher: One mistake in the DNA code and you're pumpin out albinos.

Discussing Journeys in English:
Teacher: So what do we find on a journey? What do we come across?
Student: Minotaur!
Teacher: *blank stare* Class in laughs..

Melbourne Cup day:
Teacher rode toy horse into the classroom.

 

[ibewatto]

eco teacher: bestest is a word

eng teacher: you guys dont care if i say "fuck" do you?

pe/sub (to my mates): YOU'RE IN YEAR 11 YOU SHOULDN"T NEED TO BE BABYSATTED

legal teacher: i love parent teacher interviews...the mums are getting younger and younger

sub: this fat neighbour of mine fell over and wen we all went to pic her up i through up in my mouth because she was so disgusting

thats all i can think of atm

 

[kuroneko]

My music teacher says 'does that make sense?' like every second sentence. A couple of us have taken it upon ourselves to have a tally of how many times she says it in one class...

Same teacher had a migraine one day and said something like "You probably won't be able to understand my ramblings after a while so pay attention to my interpretive dancing..."

Our business studies teacher is a legend. One time:
"....A hobo on the street and a rich c!nt-"
*Class erupts with laughter*
"-richest man in the country..."
He seemed ashamed lol.

Haha one time we had a substitute in Geography, and me and another girl were talking, the seedy old man sub comes up to us and says, "I want to watch you do your work. I like to watch." He said it so seriously and me and the girl just looked at each other and laughed when he left.
Ew.

 

[powerdrive]

In maths we were talking about crap cars and shitboxes.

Teacher: quit paying out crap cars!
Us: what do you drive?
Teacher: a crap one

a little pause...

Teacher: if elephant shit had four wheels...

 

[.x.Cookie.x.]

I remember back in year 10 my English teacher told us she was 'Going to ride us hard'.

She would always say things the wrong way, or when we would say something she would take it the wrong way.

She's a classic. Best teacher ever. She did swear a lot too.

 

[BamBam90]

My female Legal teacher: So remember girls, if you ever get pulled over by a male police officer cry, it works for me.


Nice legal advice [:

 

[Annalisee]

I don't get it. LOL.

He doesn't have very high hopes for us

 

[me121]

The morning before our HSC exam,
Student: Sir, can I borrow your brain.
Teacher: Yes, but only if you let me borrow yours.
Student: Why would you want mine?
Teacher: Because it's never been used, its in prime shape.

 

[yosemite sam]

^ Yeah it doesn't answer this thread.
This is an amusing thread recounting the various habits and quotes that our teachers have had/said over the years for the entertainment of others.

 

[Aplus]

lou071, it's not a serious discussion.

 

[rubificticious]

A pat on the back for trying, though.

 

[ObjectsInSpace]

I had a teacher supervising an exam who we all swear threw a box of tissues at a guy who was sniffing in the middle of the trial HSC and hit him square in the head.

However, I work with his daughter andshe doesn't know anything about it, which makes me think the teacher simply hit this guy on the head with the box while it was still in his hand and the throwing it part was simply added in all the verbl replays.