Afghan women: be sexually obedient to your husbands or starve (1 Viewer)

[Kwayera]

Afghanistan has quietly passed a law permitting Shia men to deny their wives food and sustenance if they refuse to obey their husbands' sexual demands, despite international outrage over an earlier version of the legislation which President Hamid Karzai had promised to review.

The new final draft of the legislation also grants guardianship of children exclusively to their fathers and grandfathers, and requires women to get permission from their husbands to work.

"It also effectively allows a rapist to avoid prosecution by paying 'blood money' to a girl who was injured when he raped her," the US charity Human Rights Watch said.

In early April, Barack Obama and Gordon Brown joined an international chorus of condemnation when the Guardian revealed that the earlier version of the law legalised rape within marriage, according to the UN.

Although Karzai appeared to back down, activists say the revised version of the law still contains repressive measures and contradicts the Afghan constitution and international treaties signed by the country.

Islamic law experts and human rights activists say that although the language of the original law has been changed, many of the provisions that alarmed women's rights groups remain, including this one: "Tamkeen is the readiness of the wife to submit to her husband's reasonable sexual enjoyment, and her prohibition from going out of the house, except in extreme circumstances, without her husband's permission. If any of the above provisions are not followed by the wife she is considered disobedient."

The law has been backed by the hardline Shia cleric Ayatollah Mohseni, who is thought to have influence over the voting intentions of some of the country's Shias, which make up around 20% of the population. Karzai has assiduously courted such minority leaders in the run up to next Thursday's election, which is likely to be a close run thing, according to a poll released yesterday.

Human Rights Watch, which has obtained a copy of the final law, called on all candidates to pledge to repeal the law, which it says contradicts Afghanistan's own constitution.

The group said that Karzai had "made an unthinkable deal to sell Afghan women out in the support of fundamentalists in the August 20 election".

Brad Adams, the organisation's Asia director, said: "The rights of Afghan women are being ripped up by powerful men who are using women as pawns in manoeuvres to gain power.

"These kinds of barbaric laws were supposed to have been relegated to the past with the overthrow of the Taliban in 2001, yet Karzai has revived them and given them his official stamp of approval."

Afghanistan passes 'barbaric' law diminishing women's rights | World news | guardian.co.uk


Disgusting.

 

[adomad]

Re: Afghanistani women: have sex with your husbands or starve

lol so random. just another case as arabs seeing women as sex dolls

 

[MrBoston]

Terrorists win

 

[Omie Jay]

that is completely screwd up.

 

[black_kat_meow]

women are designed emotionally and physically to be nothing but fuck toys for men

but then they wouldn't feel mistreated and get depressed, which they do, if they were emotionally designed to be so?

Poor job at aggravating, try again Shane.

 

[Napstar]

Anyone who objects to Afghanistan being blown off the map, state your objections now or forever hold your peace.

Thanks.

 

[Napstar]

but then they wouldn't feel mistreated and get depressed, which they do, if they were emotionally designed to be so?

Poor job at aggravating, try again Shane.

No, no. Women who do that just need a big cup of harden the fuck up.

It's emotionally distressing to see women emotionally distressed over a relationship/man, especially given that they can see how unhealthy the relationship is, and ESPECIALLY given that they don't live in Afghanistan and can leave at any time with the law on their side.

 

[black_kat_meow]

No, no. Women who do that just need a big cup of harden the fuck up.

It's emotionally distressing to see women emotionally distressed over a relationship/man, especially given that they can see how unhealthy the relationship is, and ESPECIALLY given that they don't live in Afghanistan and can leave at any time with the law on their side.

Good way to reveal your ignorance of how women in abusive relationships think. It's not that simple. Fear plays a major role.

 

[maryBRAHS]

Afghan men just seem really horny by the looks of it.
cant get some?
solution: make a law to get some.

 

[David Spade]

fear of what exarctly?

 

[black_kat_meow]

fear of what exarctly?

Could be many things:

-violence
-further emotional abuse
-loss of support mechanism if he has gone to the point of isolating her from her support network
-could be financial reasons, further complicated if there are children involved

etc

 

[Napstar]

Good way to reveal your ignorance of how women in abusive relationships think. It's not that simple. Fear plays a major role.

We all know how a woman in an abusive relationship thinks, thanks in part to your incessant posting of the situation and given the substantial amount of support you have received endeavoring you to leave the situation before it gets worse.

It is that simple, because if a person can recognize that the only thing stopping them from saving themself is fear, then really nothing should be stopping them. They don't have archaic laws governing them, they have networks and services and I would hope, the mental capacity to leave an unhealthy and damaging relationship.

Anyone who compares their situation, or even hints at a likeness to their situation with the current situation in Afghanistan is a trollop. These women understand fear, and for good reason.

 

[black_kat_meow]

We all know how a woman in an abusive relationship thinks, thanks in part to your incessant posting of the situation and given the substantial amount of support you have received endeavoring you to leave the situation before it gets worse.

It is that simple, because if a person can recognize that the only thing stopping them from saving themself is fear, then really nothing should be stopping them. They don't have archaic laws governing them, they have networks and services and I would hope, the mental capacity to leave an unhealthy and damaging relationship.

Anyone who compares their situation, or even hints at a likeness to their situation with the current situation in Afghanistan is a trollop. These women understand fear, and for good reason.

I actually wasn't likening it to the situation in Afghanistan, that is truly horrific, I was responding to Shane's joking around.

The point is that they are NOT always mentally capable of leaving such a situation and they don't always know that there is support out there.

 

[Napstar]

Could be many things:

-violence
-further emotional abuse
-loss of support mechanism if he has gone to the point of isolating her from her support network
-could be financial reasons, further complicated if there are children involved

etc

All of these are irrational fears or excuses employed by the female to validate their existence in the relationship, instead of getting the help they know they need.

- Violence: get an apprehended violence order
- Further emotional abuse: Get yourself an apprehended violence order. Change your phone number, delete them from your email account, minimise the amount of contact you have with this person.
- Loss of support: One will form new support networks when they remove themselves from the current situation of isolation.
- Finance: There are a range of financial benefits that can be applied for in the event of a separation on grounds of abuse.

This is not rocket science. Many women have looked at the same brick wall and decided it is hopeless, for whatever reason. many have also decided to stop being victims and have crushed that wall.

 

[black_kat_meow]

All of these are irrational fears or excuses employed by the female to validate their existence in the relationship, instead of getting the help they know they need.

- Violence: get an apprehended violence order
- Further emotional abuse: Get yourself an apprehended violence order. Change your phone number, delete them from your email account, minimise the amount of contact you have with this person.
- Loss of support: One will form new support networks when they remove themselves from the current situation of isolation.
- Finance: There are a range of financial benefits that can be applied for in the event of a separation on grounds of abuse.

This is not rocket science. Many women have looked at the same brick wall and decided it is hopeless, for whatever reason. many have also decided to stop being victims and have crushed that wall.

AVO's are not always particularly effective. I have friends who's exes have also hunted them down when they've moved and changed all contact details, with the police having no interest in helping.

It's not so easy forming a new support network. You don't just magically do this, especially when your social skills have potentially been affected. People suffereing from depression and other mental illnesses find this a mjor issue, it's not as easy to rebuild a supportive network as people think.

Edit: I realise some women are quite capable of changing their situation if they truly wanted to, but you can't just throw all women in such relationships into the same category.

 

[Napstar]

AVO's are not always particularly effective. I have friends who's exes have also hunted them down when they've moved and changed all contact details, with the police having no interest in helping.

It's not so easy forming a new support network. You don't just magically do this, especially when your social skills have potentially been affected. People suffereing from depression and other mental illnesses find this a mjor issue, it's not as easy to rebuild a supportive network as people think.

Edit: I realise some women are quite capable of changing their situation if they truly wanted to, but you can't just throw all women in such relationships into the same category.

All of these are throw back excuses for not being proactive.

No, AVO's aren't always effective and yes some women are still failed by the system after seeking protection. A hell of a lot more don't reach the system because they are killed or beaten to the brink of death. I know some will rationalise their situation by saying "He will still find me if I get an AVO", but this doesn't rationalise it at all.

It's not easy forming a new support network, but it's not impossible either. I can list probably 30 women's shelters, domestic violence services and other network systems available in Sydney alone off the top of my head. A women's shelter is not ideal living circumstance at first, but neither is going to bed with your face punched in every night.

 

[Napstar]

The point, which is entirely off topic now...

Is that these women don't have the opportunities we do in terms of removing themselves or helping themselves. They have basically been legislated into a corner, whereas women in Australia do have the rights and do have the law on their side.

Anyone who says their situation is impossible needs to read this story and restock.

 

[black_kat_meow]

You are still overlooking the fragile emotional state these women are in. This can't be so easily rationalised. Abused people do not make the most logical decisions.

As much as you hate me using myself and my life (I'm tiring of it too), I've been in a similar situation with my family. My dad was beating the shit out of me and my mother told me I had to lie and protect him or he'd lose his job and the family would suffer (guilt tripping). Also she said I'd be sent to a foster home and they'd rape me and treat me terribly (inciting fear). Being 16, I was frightened and too scared to act other than how they told me to.

Some of these women who have been in a cycle of abuse for a long time are reduced to a child hood when it comes to making decisions related to their situation.

I don't think I'll argue with you much longer, not everyone is as strong minded and independent as you think. Fear is crippling for some.

 

[black_kat_meow]

The point, which is entirely off topic now...

Is that these women don't have the opportunities we do in terms of removing themselves or helping themselves. They have basically been legislated into a corner, whereas women in Australia do have the rights and do have the law on their side.

Anyone who says their situation is impossible needs to read this story and restock.

I did not say it's impossible, and I was not relating it to this story. Just explaining that it's not as easy as many who have not experienced such situations think. And even those who have, just because they were strong enough to stand up for themselves doesn't mean all women are as capable.

 

[Napstar]

Yes okay I understand that, but if we compare the situation

a. The only barrier women in Australia have, is an emotional/mental barrier
b. These women have a legal barrier

And this is why it pains me to the point of endless frustration when women here admit that they KNOW exactly why they aren't leaving the situation, when they point blank say "I know I have been/am being guilt tripped and emotionally abused into thinking I am the one in the wrong" and shit fuck cunt, if you know then show this shitcunt you're not to be messed with.

Anyway,
/end rant