GF cheated on me - still not over it. (2 Viewers)

[quiggle3]

cheaters suck. Fortunately, mine was a sluuuuuuuuut anyway so i got rid of her and didnt cry once.

 

[Riet]

cheaters suck. Fortunately, mine was a sluuuuuuuuut anyway so i got rid of her and didnt cry once.

^^ bitter cos he never got to hit that.

 

[rattus69]

Hai everyone, thought I'd vent on the Bos. If you're into psycho girl stories have a read.

Febuary this year I was going out with a very close high school friend - she'd just come out of a really nasty relationship which ended in her spending a significant amount of time in a mental institution, but having been really close friends for years I thought it would work out.

Whilst it got off to a great start things soon became fucked up - parents kicked her out, she stopped taking her meds and was clearly not over her ex. She ended up dogging a lot of social events but having been one of my closest friends through high school I forgave her and thought things would clear up.

One day after she dogged another family dinner (she was 'sick') I drove down to her house looking for a reason for all the bs. I found her having dinner with this guy who claimed to be her boyfriend. After some fighting she told me what he said was true and that things 'hadn't been easy for her', I told her to piss off and went to a friends.

My friend ended up abusing the shit out of her via myspace. My ex then turned the scenario on its head, using the fact that my friend knew she had bipolar (thus 'I'd betrayed her trust') and some crap about me being in love with my friend to make out that I'd betrayed her. The next day she said she loved me and we agreed to talk things over that night but when I called she didn't answer. She's since stopped answering my calls and has blocked me over msn.

***

Fast forward to now, a month later. Everything is really quiet - my friends are around, uni is great and I've already started seeing someone else, but this whole thing still feels like the elephant in the room.

Sometimes I get pissed off that I didn't get the last laugh in this scenario. Despite the fact she's cheated on me I didn't punch her boyfriend in the throat nor chant 'whore' at her, my last words were me being a diplomatic suckass. Whilst I think this is totally wrong it would have been great to tell her that I'd met someone else too as it would have resulted in some slashed wrists.

Worst thing is though is that I miss my best friend - if somebody else had done this she'd be here for me right now. She said she loved me and I don't know why on earth she's done this. I wish I knew why and if she still cared. I'd like to think she feels as hurt as me, but in all probability she's girl-rationalised fucking me over.

Any tips for recovering or is it just a time thing? older friends tell me to put my dick in someone else but the whole thing seems to run a lot deeper.

Cliffs:
- Went out with a close friend from highschool
- She had problems
- Ended up cheating on me
- Ended up twisting some events afterwards in an excuse for doing so
- Its been a month and I'm still unsettled, looking for tips for getting over her.

Basically you just need to put your mind at rest,
she is a bit loopy -end of story
its hard to let go sometimes i understand.
i have been through so many relationships that end bad and have finally found one that i actually like,
you could still be there as a friend to her if one day she decides to talk to you about what she did but you would probably not want her again.

i feel like im in a bit of a problem at the moment actually;
i dont have a family i can run to they dont want to know me
i havent got a car so i rely on my boyfriend to give me lifts to school and work
and sometimes he helps me pay the bills
it makes me feel terrible for consuming up alot of his time during our HSC
but im kinda stuck without that extra help, any suggestions?

 

[quiggle3]

Basically you just need to put your mind at rest,
she is a bit loopy -end of story
its hard to let go sometimes i understand.
i have been through so many relationships that end bad and have finally found one that i actually like,
you could still be there as a friend to her if one day she decides to talk to you about what she did but you would probably not want her again.

i feel like im in a bit of a problem at the moment actually;
i dont have a family i can run to they dont want to know me
i havent got a car so i rely on my boyfriend to give me lifts to school and work
and sometimes he helps me pay the bills
it makes me feel terrible for consuming up alot of his time during our HSC
but im kinda stuck without that extra help, any suggestions?

or u could just grow a pair and get the fuck over it. That never fails.

 

[xxrenzo]

yeah, you're not over it.
your feelings for 'revenge', the hatred, are just your ways of dealing with it and feeling better about yourself because she really cut your ego
once you realise they're just your defence mechanisms it'll be easier to deal with


it's only been one month...
just keep occupied and learn from your mistakes

 

[Oliver04]

The first few paragraphs on this quote is a normal reaction. However, you should realise that you're only stooping down if you decide to take these actions. I had a similar (not really, but yeah) situation before and the best you could do is accept it - move on - be nice about it, and then that's where they'll realise what they missed out on. If not, they don't deserve you.

lol, its been a while.

I did nothing. I went to the gym, partied with friends and dated a few girls.

Last conversation I had with my ex in a long while was a few weeks ago. I got a facebook message out of the blue asking why I'd declined an invite to her party. I told her I wasn't interested and she went into this rant about being best friends and crap. I just answered 'I have enough friends' and left it at that.

Probably the best thing I did to get over it was date other people. Coming out of it it seemed like she was the most interesting person in the world but having been with a few girls since and having learnt how they tick you realise that other girls can be just as charming.

Thanks for everyone who read and gave input to this post, meant a lot to me at the time.

final update: last I heard my ex was in hospital having lost half her bodyweight. Lol.

 

[TERMINATOR-HX]

lol, its been a while.

I did nothing. I went to the gym, partied with friends and dated a few girls.

Last conversation I had with my ex in a long while was a few weeks ago. I got a facebook message out of the blue asking why I'd declined an invite to her party. I told her I wasn't interested and she went into this rant about being best friends and crap. I just answered 'I have enough friends' and left it at that.

Probably the best thing I did to get over it was date other people. Coming out of it it seemed like she was the most interesting person in the world but having been with a few girls since and having learnt how they tick you realise that other girls can be just as charming.

It is a good lesson to learn that often the best way to get over someone is to move on. My brother learned after a messy breakup. His ex reacted a bit differently than to yours: she gained weight....lots of it