GF cheated on me - still not over it. (1 Viewer)

[cannibal.horse]

Hai everyone, thought I'd vent on the Bos. If you're into psycho girl stories have a read.

Febuary this year I was going out with a very close high school friend - she'd just come out of a really nasty relationship which ended in her spending a significant amount of time in a mental institution, but having been really close friends for years I thought it would work out.

Whilst it got off to a great start things soon became fucked up - parents kicked her out, she stopped taking her meds and was clearly not over her ex. She ended up dogging a lot of social events but having been one of my closest friends through high school I forgave her and thought things would clear up.

One day after she dogged another family dinner (she was 'sick') I drove down to her house looking for a reason for all the bs. I found her having dinner with this guy who claimed to be her boyfriend. After some fighting she told me what he said was true and that things 'hadn't been easy for her', I told her to piss off and went to a friends.

My friend ended up abusing the shit out of her via myspace. My ex then turned the scenario on its head, using the fact that my friend knew she had bipolar (thus 'I'd betrayed her trust') and some crap about me being in love with my friend to make out that I'd betrayed her. The next day she said she loved me and we agreed to talk things over that night but when I called she didn't answer. She's since stopped answering my calls and has blocked me over msn.

***

Fast forward to now, a month later. Everything is really quiet - my friends are around, uni is great and I've already started seeing someone else, but this whole thing still feels like the elephant in the room.

Sometimes I get pissed off that I didn't get the last laugh in this scenario. Despite the fact she's cheated on me I didn't punch her boyfriend in the throat nor chant 'whore' at her, my last words were me being a diplomatic suckass. Whilst I think this is totally wrong it would have been great to tell her that I'd met someone else too as it would have resulted in some slashed wrists.

Worst thing is though is that I miss my best friend - if somebody else had done this she'd be here for me right now. She said she loved me and I don't know why on earth she's done this. I wish I knew why and if she still cared. I'd like to think she feels as hurt as me, but in all probability she's girl-rationalised fucking me over.

Any tips for recovering or is it just a time thing? older friends tell me to put my dick in someone else but the whole thing seems to run a lot deeper.

Cliffs:
- Went out with a close friend from highschool
- She had problems
- Ended up cheating on me
- Ended up twisting some events afterwards in an excuse for doing so
- Its been a month and I'm still unsettled, looking for tips for getting over her.

 

[townie]

you feel bad because you feel guilty.

yeah, she cheated on you, but she had bipolar and instead of being a supportive friend after he break up and shit, and beyond, you chose to want to be more than that and stick your dick in her. then when you were in a relationship, instead of trying to deal with he illness, u just got totally jealous and stalked her.

 

[tallkid34]

I'd normally never post in this forum but your situation was somewhat similar to mine around the time i finished high school.

Anyway, most you can do is just keep yourself occupied in the meanwhile. This sorta of shit can last while so bear with it and eventually, it will fade...

You complain now that it didn't end the way you wanted it to but that doesn't matter anymore. To be honest, you'd probably win here in the end because you'll amount to more than she ever will.

Bear that in mind. Cut your losses. And get on with your life.

 

[cannibal.horse]

you feel bad because you feel guilty.

yeah, she cheated on you, but she had bipolar and instead of being a supportive friend after he break up and shit, and beyond, you chose to want to be more than that and stick your dick in her. then when you were in a relationship, instead of trying to deal with he illness, u just got totally jealous and stalked her.

I appreciate your opinion but she was my girlfriend you bell end.

Shit was rough for her, I understand that, but in no way does that justify having two boyfriends at once.

 

[MC Squidge]

get over it and move on bro

 

[darkwolfzx]

Avoid brooding over the issue, it could impact on your current relationship. I know its easier said than done, but go organise and do stuff with friends, and have fun. From experience, these sorts of issues will fall away, and whenever you do come across it down the memory lane, you'll realise it gets easier and easier to say it was just a bad run in your life, you learnt from it and you're a better person because of it.

She's now a shadow in your life. Focus on what you have now, rather than what you thought you had then, and once again, have fun!

 

[Pace_T]

its only 1 month later and you're already seeing someone else?
whats wrong with you kids these days

 

[cannibal.horse]

its only 1 month later and you're already seeing someone else?
whats wrong with you kids these days

It was actually 2 days...

 

[Pace_T]

terrible!

 

[cannibal.horse]

terrible!

I can't say I feel bad about that. Not long after there were a few social events at uni. I was pretty adament I wasn't going to dwell on her and make the most of it and I did I guess.

 

[blue_chameleon]

All in all, it's a time thing. Sometimes life throws you shit, and you have to deal with it and move on. It's hard when she was a close friend to you, but that doesn't change the fact that this is just one of many experiences you will have throughout your life. You get older, you experience more.

Suggestions of physical violence or revenge, however intense they may be, tell me that you're still a bit immature with dealing with situations like this. Sometimes it's best to leave friends as friends to avoid complications like this.

Man up and hang out with your friends more/make some new friends at uni. Eitherway, you need to commit to putting this behind you and focusing on something else until you're able to look at this with less emotion and take from it an important lesson.

 

[Omie Jay]

i dont get how ppl break up with their partner, only to get them selves another gf/bf a few days later.

do not understand.

 

[sdcloud69]

i dont get how ppl break up with their partner, only to get them selves another gf/bf a few days later.

do not understand.

me too, but i'm a virgin who's never had a GF.

i'm not like you people.

 

[Omie Jay]

me too

 

[cannibal.horse]

i dont get how ppl break up with their partner, only to get them selves another gf/bf a few days later.

do not understand.

Because despite what the movies tell you the best thing you can do is get back to the norm (for me studying, gym, friends, dating girls).

 

[Omie Jay]

so its normal to just find some random chick and date her after uve broken a relationship?

no deep feelings or anything? or just going from one chick to another like some man whore?

 

[sdcloud69]

me too

omg

and you like metal

it must be a sign

 

[Omie Jay]

dude im not gay.


stay away from me plz

 

[sdcloud69]

playing hard to get huh?


you'll come around babes

 

[cannibal.horse]

so its normal to just find some random chick and date her after uve broken a relationship?

no deep feelings or anything? or just going from one chick to another like some man whore?

I understand what you are saying - if I moved on so fast I probably didn't care much for the girl in the first place.

I can't really say I agree with you though. As much as I still care for her I want to move on. Luck had it that I met someone else nice within the next few days though, and despite how difficult it is to pretend this never happened it sure as hell beats kicking myself months down the track when I realise I've blown an opportunity to meet someone decent.