Bribe the canteen lady into putting laxatives in his lunch order.
But seriously... what red-neck school do you go to? If it bothers you that much you should ask your parents to let you switch schools. You don't need the added pressure during your HSC year... besides if someone like him can make it to school captain, it doesn't sound like your school as a whole is going to perform too well in the HSC... I know it would be hard to change and leave your friends behind, but it sounds like it would be worth it.
But seriously... what red-neck school do you go to? If it bothers you that much you should ask your parents to let you switch schools. You don't need the added pressure during your HSC year... besides if someone like him can make it to school captain, it doesn't sound like your school as a whole is going to perform too well in the HSC... I know it would be hard to change and leave your friends behind, but it sounds like it would be worth it.