what are easy, guilt free ways to become friends with girls at Uni? (3 Viewers)

[Jaundice]

unless you are some nervous basement asian with sweaty palms.

 

[Shadowdude]

Well, introducing yourself to chicks should be fine - but what about the hot chicks? =P

 

[mitchy_boy]

Well, introducing yourself to chicks should be fine - but what about the hot chicks? =P

One step at a time buddy. Gotta learn the ropes first

Also, if you haven't seen it Shadow;

 

[Jaundice]

yeah i've befriended attractive males and females solely to use them for notes/info.

just be cool.

 

[Shadowdude]

One step at a time buddy. Gotta learn the ropes first

Also, if you haven't seen it Shadow;

The sad thing about that song... is that it's better than most of the things at the top of the charts now.


And ah I see jaundice, that's... an interesting plan. And a nice plan too!

 

[Chevalier]

unless you are some nervous basement asian with sweaty palms.

that could be me. Most days I stay home, read, spend time on the computer and play video games. And even now I have sweaty palms as I am typing furiously at a keyboard. But I don't live in a basement, my computer's in the living room

Usually I'm pretty nervous and hesitant about meeting girls (if its not of my own accord, that is if I have a legitimate excuse to talk to one in the first place) and am generally uncomfortable with large social get-togethers especially if there are lots of random people (my friend's friends etc) However I do have a close group of friends whom I feel very comfortable hanging out with (no prizes for guessing that there aren't any girls in the group, which is entirely composed of guys from our all male school) but otherwise if its with people who aren't part of my inner circle it can get rather awkward.

The last time I went to an 18th birthday, which was at the beginning of last year I just crawled up on the couch and watched tv. And I spoke to as little people as possible, hell I didn't even introduce myself properly as I was at a loss at what to say. Needless to say from retrospect it was a pretty unmemorable and forgettable experience

 

[Shadowdude]

My palms aren't sweaty. Nor am I in a basement right now.

I win?

 

[Jaundice]

Usually I'm pretty nervous and hesitant about meeting girls (if its not of my own accord, that is if I have a legitimate excuse to talk to one in the first place) and I am generally uncomfrotable to large social get-togethers especially if there are lots of random people (my friend's friends etc) However I do have a close group of friends whom I feel very comfortable hanging out with but otherwise if its with people who aren't part of my inner circle it can get rather awkward.

just leave your comfort zone and put on the fascade of confidence. Or you could take antidepressants for a while but i endorse the comfort zone thing.


Shadow does not win. You basement nerd.

 

[Shadowdude]

But I'm not even in a darn basement <_<

Or is it a metaphorical one?

 

[Jaundice]

how very assertive.

 

[Chevalier]

Hmm never thought of the idea of putting on a false show of confidence before, although I'm pretty sure I did that at the formal; just playing it cool and trying to look in control, but just a few hours later the act fell apart. At such gatherings I kinda just feel disinterested in talking to people. Especially if there are plenty of other ppl whom I feel they would be more interested in talking to. Most of the time I kinda just find little common ground between multiple people, which is why I prefer one one one convos or with small groups of people, preferably people I'm acquainted with. At large social gatherings I'm the guy that tends to get ignored, but mabye I'm not trying hard enough, or rather I'm just a lazy bugger.

 

[Shadowdude]

Well, maybe you're naturally shy. Don't worry about it too much.

If you want to become friends with girls - you'll have to show a bit more confidence (which will come from passion). If you want to become friends with someone, you may end up as friends.

 

[Jaundice]

sometimes i wonder what it must have been like to go to a boys school and be shy

"omg yesterday my brother had a house party and when it was quiet i sat next to this passed out girl on the couch. I squeezed her tit and it was soft guys! =D"

or something similar

 

[Shadowdude]

That's sad... and cheating. Why not win a girl fair and square? It'd be better... wouldn't it?

Maybe I'm just old fashioned like that...

 

[slyhunter]

That's sad... and cheating. Why not win a girl fair and square? It'd be better... wouldn't it?

Maybe I'm just old fashioned like that...

We noticed. =P

 

[Chevalier]

ok I won't comment on that but I do think that good relationships take time and effort to build. It shoudln't be easy and there shouldn't be any shortcuts. That way u can really feel that ur partner is special and what u have between u and ur partner is special indeed.

Hey what am I saying? I'm the one in need of good relationship advice

 

[allyoop]

I am just lol-ing at this thread right now (not at your situation though, Chevalier, I would never do that)

Hmm well I think your problem lies with self-esteem, maybe? I reckon you should try and get out more, not necessarily go out and talk to the first girl you see, but perhaps do something that you wouldn't normally do.. drag yourself out of the house, pick up a new sport, or instrument.. or whatever, and learn it!

Go out there AND RIDE A SKATEBOARD WOO (or a camel, whichever floats your boat).

When you feel confident in yourself, that's when you can approach people. I think it would be awkward for me and the guy if he approached me but it was quite obvious that he didn't know what to say..

Oh I know. Get a job. It requires you to work with your peers, and depending what it is, serve customers. Guaranteed one of them has to be female..

 

[Shadowdude]

^ Exactly on both things - you have the structure down pat, you just need the... know-how to fill it in.

 

[Chevalier]

I am just lol-ing at this thread right now (not at your situation though, Chevalier, I would never do that)

Hmm well I think your problem lies with self-esteem, maybe? I reckon you should try and get out more, not necessarily go out and talk to the first girl you see, but perhaps do something that you wouldn't normally do.. drag yourself out of the house, pick up a new sport, or instrument.. or whatever, and learn it!

Go out there AND RIDE A SKATEBOARD WOO (or a camel, whichever floats your boat).

When you feel confident in yourself, that's when you can approach people. I think it would be awkward for me and the guy if he approached me but it was quite obvious that he didn't know what to say..

Oh I know. Get a job. It requires you to work with your peers, and depending what it is, serve customers. Guaranteed one of them has to be female..

right on the money ally it is to do with self esteem, probably due to me having a rather rough time at a selective all boys school. Although I think when u start at University during the first few weeks I, like other ppl, will probably be going off on a temporary self esteem high, what with all the new ppl u have to meet and having to give a good impression to everyone u meet. But I suppose this show of bravado will wear off in due time.

And I guess the problem also lies with fear of failure as I'm always weighing up the implications of taking any kind of action. I tend to reflect on the negative possibilities a little too much methinks.

I do have a job (actually two jobs, they're both tutoring jobs) but none of my co-workers are female and I'll mostly be tutoring kids under the age of 16

 

[Chevalier]

sooner or later someone should kindly tell me to stop and shut up, as I could go on forever...