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Urgent advice needed(please, please, please) (1 Viewer)

misericordia

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hi, i've got problem with my sex friend (who i love-although he doesn't fancy me in that way)
i'm usually in touch with him for once a week, but we were in touch quite often via txt msging lately. like, two days in a row (we rarely do that)until friday. i said, 'hey babe what r u doin?' and he rang me back (but i missed the call). Then I rang him back, but as soon as he picked up the phone, he said 'sorry can't meet ya im at meeting'(he is older than me), and i got pissed off at the fact that he thought that i was the one who wants to continue this kind of relationship(that i'm the initiator), so i said, 'i wasn't thinking of that. k BYE', and hanged up quickly. now he is probably thinking that i'm annoying and although he said that i can come over to his place on monday, but i'm wondering what i should do if he never contact me until monday. should i txt/ring him on monday if so or should i let him be on his own? (but its really hard-i like him so much). i'm really stressed and worried that he might think im some kind of freak and hates me. if you have any resolution about this, please reply...
 

Born Dancer

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are you sure this is all worth it? i mean if he doesnt feel the same way, is it worth persuing anything with him? what do you really want out of this?
also, being clingy is bad. take a step back a little and let him call the shots?
 

misericordia

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i try to stop being so obsessed, i really try to get rid of him but it seems impossible. i tried, but i don't know how i can keep away from him. i am kind of weird i guess, cause i want something more than sex friend, but definitely less than b.f. also i get attracted to someone who is not that interested in me and often mean.
 

bubz :D

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ahh these situations suck. never, ever get into something like this if one of you have feelings and the other doesn't... but it's easier said than done. it's so easy to fall into it either by convincing yourself that you don't reaaally like him, or convincing yourself that his feelings might change....

anyway, chances are you will find that he didn't think anything of your call :p girls tend to overanalyse A LOT. don't stress about it. in the meantime, you might want to think about what you really want out of your relationship with him - your feelings are obviously different (since you say you love him)... can you talk to him about it? it might hurt a lot to do it now, but in the long run it's just easier to just cut it off NOW rather than stringing it along hoping something might happen.
 

misericordia

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by the way, he just rang me and told me that he can't meet me on monday(work) and he asked me whether i can come over to his house in the weekend or tuesday or wednesday. he said that he will negotiate with his boss thoe....
i can't just simply move on. i've tried it but for the whole 1 month, i couldn't stop thinking about him and i was really unhappy. what did YOU people do when you found it hard to move on?
 

misericordia

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Hey secret, i'm not offended by you or anything, just thought to say that.
I guess what you say is true, only if you are out of the situation but noone except for me is in this situation so i can't really judge or feel negative to your comment, aye.
anyways.
 

LaraAshley

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How old is this guy? He sounds older than you. Anyways, you should meet up with him and talk about it face to face instead of just text messaging each other.
 

misericordia

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he is 21 y.o. currently (and finally) working. if you want to know more, he has got gamble addiction.
 
X

xeuyrawp

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Mike Ockisard said:
this isnt about what you think
Exactly. Secret, if you can't handle open talk about sex, but instead want to lecture about your conservative morality, don't come in here.

I'll remind you that the world has 'come to' nothing - casual sex is older than history, it's just now that it's becoming less taboo in conversation.
 

hiphophooray123

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Give him the best blowjob you have ever given (i assume you have alot of experience from like year 8 and stuff) then he'll remain your 'sex friend' no matter how annoying or stupid you are. Remember to include alot of saliva, don't be afraid to spit and definently lick up and down the shaft, you might want to suck on his balls too.
 

misericordia

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TO hiphophooray123 :
there was no need to mention about blow job and make assumption that i've been having sex since yr8. in fact, i was virgin until this year and the first person i ever kissed and had sex was this guy. yes, i do go down on him and 69 and things, but not all the time. i wouldn't do those things to the person that i don't love(or like very much, at least). i seem like a slut but i want to keep him, so there is no choice except for being sex friends. you don't even know this.
 

misericordia

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TO hiphophooray123 :
there was no need to mention about blow job and make assumption that i've been having sex since yr8. in fact, i was virgin until this year and the first person i ever kissed and had sex was this guy. yes, i do go down on him and 69 and things, but not all the time. i wouldn't do those things to the person that i don't love(or like very much, at least). i seem like a slut but i want to keep him, so there is no choice except for being sex friends. you don't even know this. and i am not stupid and annoying (at least, not stupid when i'm not with him) so stop assuming.
 

ur_inner_child

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I'd say find a new focus. I'm not saying forget about him, because that's always the hardest thing to do, but as bubz said, take a step back.

Focus on your friends, hang out with them a little more than you do. Or focus on your self esteem, but going to the gym or have a regular run, so you feel good about yourself.
 

ur_inner_child

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I just reckon its the best when someone you keep close in contact with keeps making you feel like shit. Even if you don't want to get rid of that person as of yet, you need to maintain some sort of balance or you're just going to spiral downwards.

:)

Move to another area in your life, your family, friends, go shopping, work out... etc
 

misericordia

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thanks guys...
i've been thinking a lot, but i can't detatch myself...just yet. but i do appreciate the advice that suggested me to diversify my interest, i think i will try to take as much time off from obsessing about him. that advice was quite new for me, and i really want to thank you :)
 

misericordia

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no, i will not do anything stupid like sending *him* PM...XD seriously hell no. but thanx for the warning la~
 

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