Too pretty? (1 Viewer)

[Skittled]

I know it's a huge romantic dream that Mr Perfect will ride up on his white horse and sweep the princess (ie you) off her feet, completley overwhelming you with unconditional love, purely for who you ARE, rather than who you appear to be... but that's not reality, unfortunately...

Girls can be (physically) attractive without a guy being attracted to them. What ur_inner_child said is pretty spot on:

maybe she lacks presence. She puts up a guard when she talks or whatever.

If she's physically attractive, she needs to work on actually 'attractING' guys, rather than just being attractive. If she doesn't seem interested or open , then noone's going to approach her. People are pretty fearful of rejection (95% of guys, anyway), so her apparent 'closed-off-ness' is sometimes intimidating, othertimes just tells you that you're so unlikely to be successful, it's a waste of time. The assumption of having a boyfriend doesn't always happen, but it's more likely to happen if she seems uninterested in guys and is good looking --it's like a guy not wanting sex from his girlfriend, and the girlfriend then assuming he's getting some elsewhere. People have needs, and if she seems not interested, there's probably a reason for that so I'd not bother. (Hypothetically, anyway; I'm taken and devoted to my girl, so I'm not interested. )

Even if she doesn't APPROACH the guys, she plays a part in it, too. You can be proactive about it without being blatant; nothing wrong with making eye contact, and even better yet, smiling and holding eye contact for a few moments, just once or twice to get their attention and potential curiosity. Go to the bar at the same time as them - it gets him away from his mates and his guard will be a little lower; if he were to be rejected, it'd not be (as much) a public spectacle, and there's an easy exit-route for him.

I agree with the idea that it's pretty unlikely that she'll randomly meet the man of her dreams (quote: thejosiekiller), but the chances are even worse if she expects the man of her dreams to approach her. Guys have moods too: maybe the man-of-her-dreams is just in a shit mood the moment he sees her and doesn't even consider approaching her? Off goes MOHD, to find some other princess.

Any girl who's not being approached isn't being judged --on face value-- as attractive enough to be approached. 'Attractiveness' covers a lot of things, not just physically...

 

[Atticus.]

there a couple of girls like that in my law tutes...
its funny though because you do approach them and they are gibbering idiots! you hear them talk in class and they are hyper intelligent...
high uai's dont always translate to good social skills unfortunatly

 

[braad]

high uai's dont always translate to good social skills unfortunatly

orrrr common sense

 

[funniboi]

too pretty.... ?

or maybe she's just pretty cause you're her friend?

err... why don't we judge that for ya and post a pic

 

[Beckiki_S]

On second look, such girls do exist.

 

[*ashlea*]

you're "friend" is very lucky to have so many attributes, but maybe she'd find that she'd be happier if she just stopped worrying about whether or not she has a boyfriend! i mean come on, is it really that big of a deal? if she just gets out there and enjoys herself she'll appear way more fun and appealing to guys anyway, so why doesnt she just let it go? u say she doesnt want to appear desperate by approaching guys, but at least that would be proactive, just sitting around worrying about it is pretty desperate if u ask me..

 

[Skeeta]

wow that situation so totally sounds like mine at the moment



EDIT: Not

 

[braad]

you're "friend" is very lucky to have so many attributes, but maybe she'd find that she'd be happier if she just stopped worrying about whether or not she has a boyfriend! i mean come on, is it really that big of a deal? if she just gets out there and enjoys herself she'll appear way more fun and appealing to guys anyway, so why doesnt she just let it go? u say she doesnt want to appear desperate by approaching guys, but at least that would be proactive, just sitting around worrying about it is pretty desperate if u ask me..

too true...nothing better than a girl who's HAPPY and enjoying doing whatever she's doing.

wow that situation so totally sounds like mine at the moment



EDIT: Not

jeez girl, you put yourself down too much

 

[jumb]

hey I have this friend who's really pretty. blonde, tall, slim, and really tanned + she's smart...got a UAI of like 95 and is doing law at uni now. Her problem is that guys hardly ever approach her. like whenever we go out, they'll always check her out but never actually come over and talk to her and she can't seem to figure out why!! i dunno, is it just cause they're intimidated??

any guys care to help us out here plz

I liked ur_inner_childs thing, but apart from that, you could be wrong about the looks. Girls are usually pretty shitty at rating other girls, so your friend might actually be kinda ugly. Also, your friend could be acting like a cold hearted bitch. If a guy is confident and experienced enough to approach her, then they would probably also know that the cold heart bitch wouldn't be worth wasting their time or a drink on.

Failing her getting a new attitude, she could dress a bit sluttier or go to sleazier joints.

 

[emjayz]

hey I have this friend who's really pretty. blonde, tall, slim, and really tanned + she's smart...got a UAI of like 95 and is doing law at uni now. Her problem is that guys hardly ever approach her. like whenever we go out, they'll always check her out but never actually come over and talk to her and she can't seem to figure out why!! i dunno, is it just cause they're intimidated??

any guys care to help us out here plz

i think that they r intimidated by her. i mean shes pretty, and smart. guys get offended by that, i think?!?!?!

 

[ghettofabolous]

hey I have this friend who's really pretty. blonde, tall, slim, and really tanned + she's smart...got a UAI of like 95 and is doing law at uni now. Her problem is that guys hardly ever approach her. like whenever we go out, they'll always check her out but never actually come over and talk to her and she can't seem to figure out why!! i dunno, is it just cause they're intimidated??

any guys care to help us out here plz

It is intimidation - impossibly beautiful, smart = deemed unapproachable. I guess it's always expected that those who look and seem that good are the ones who'll have to do the talking

 

[braad]

i think that they r intimidated by her. i mean shes pretty, and smart. guys get offended by that, i think?!?!?!

i like the fact you doubt what you said...we have to tell you whether you thought right

 

[JiMtorin]

most guys probably lack the confidence to approach her because they think they wn't stand a chance, i guess

Thats Me.

 

[ghettofabolous]

i like the fact you doubt what you said...we have to tell you whether you thought right

She's just that darn fabolous

 

[braad]

i was thinking more along the lines of being spantastic...but whatever bakes your cake

 

[kaylz]

so she's your friend, so no wonder you think she's nice and can look beyond that. i bet she tries to be unapproachable. i don't think anyone is too pretty/good looking to be approached, but sometimes they think they are... and that is offputting.

 

[braad]

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...back on topic. if she's so smart, figure us guys out...we're not that complicated, then she'd have no problems what so ever

 

[Korn]

i don't think it's silly. i'm sure girls do and would do the same thing in their situation. in a pub situation though it doesn't matter if they are shot down

girls have always expected guys to make the first moves

Yes but that started b4 equal rights, and what does equal rights mean? It means that men and women are equal, so chicks can ask guys out and should if they really want equal rights

 

[Korn]

It is intimidation - impossibly beautiful, smart = deemed unapproachable. I guess it's always expected that those who look and seem that good are the ones who'll have to do the talking

How would someone know whether she is smart without approaching her??

 

[ghettofabolous]

i was thinking more along the lines of being spantastic...but whatever bakes your cake

Lol now way ... what 'bakes my cake' is letting the whole world know she's fabolous