LONG POST IS LONG.
If he doesn't want to approach this rationally and independently, then he's not worth bothering about.
Finish it and move on.
Yeeah, I went to the library and spoke to him, didn't tell him I liked him at that point though.
Then later on that night, I stayed up all night talking to him about everything that's happened. Still didn't tell him.
After this, we were fine completely.
He told me that he didn't care too much about us hooking up just that we just needed to be friends after that.
I told him I just wanted us to still be friends after this. Because he's fucked up many times before and I've always forgiven him and shiz and we bounce right back.
+1
You deserve better KP. Don't worry, he's a tool gurl. *Hugs*
Thank you. <3
I'm not even going to quote the things above (above the thing I've quoted below) and comment because we all know that cunt is all sorts of stupid and you two led each other on, it was a mutual thing and he shouldn't have had a problem afterwards because you two are friends and you should've just talked about it. So he's stupid. I don't think you did anything stupid (apart from sleeping in bed with him when you obviously had ~feelings~ but that's not really being stupid it's being human).
1. There's nothing wrong with being brown, you are a strong, independent, black woman who don't need no man, and it's his problem if he's an elitist racist (even though it seems like he has nothing to be elitist about).
2. You aren't ugly babe. I know you think you're ugly, but most people think badly of themselves, you are definitely not ugly. You're a pretty girl and since you've worked so hard to lose a little weight you just seem more confident and it shines right through and you shouldn't feel bad about yourself.
Thank you so much Jarrod. <3 :')
This means so much, haha.
Yeah, I basically told him he was being a contradictory elitist fuckwit after we made up and were friends again. I was bitchy to him at first but I think because of that and the constant hints during the day and later at the party (res party), he kinda realised that I had liked him which led to an interdasting development.
But ah, thank you! ><
I sort of agree here.
KP, if it concerned you why were you sleeping with him for the past 6 days?
He's my best friend. We're completely fine with doing this honestly...
Like he comforts me whenever shit happens with my parents, and usually I just stay over for the night whenever I feel really down.
Except after having to break almost, nearly most ties with my parents and the onslaught of emotional wreckage it brought with it, (may sound like bs but I know how I feel) I've stayed over, because my friends have been helping me through this, not just him.
Anyway.
So after having the convo at the library and then later on breaking down after a phonecall from parents, he and I stayed up all night - he had an assignment - talking about everything except where I tell him I like him. He basically said that he was horny and hinted at there being another "insignificant" reason. And the way I told him about what happened was most of the truth, I was open to it and it was fine, ~nbd~. He told me that he needed time to think about it and kind of skimmed over the reasons over why he had to and apologized.
After handing in his assignment, we crashed together till 4PM or so, and this time, we cuddled and shit but yeah he wasn't going all horny and shit. But we talked things out and we played some Borderlands, he taught/told me what to do and shiz.
Later on, we had a res party and we had to wear like clothes from Vinnies, so he and I weren't bothered and wore his shirts. They were so big on me, I felt fabulous feeling so tiny and thin. :') (And the fact that I wearing his shirt.) Whilst sober, I told him to not let me hook up with anyone at all, and to take me away if I did (I knew I wasn’t going to) and he was all like, “Not in the mood?” and I denied and he was all chirpy about it.
We went down before drinking to see what was up, and we started to have a balloon fight, and the photographer took tons of photos of us - who had thought we were a couple before and asked about us (crushin’ on me apparently…) and had taken (now not so)awkward photos of us which ended up on the res FB page.
We went back, he started playing vidya and I was trying to drink shit vodka, did some laundry, drank some more and went to the party. Saw the previous guy I liked (and got rejected by via the FB message) and a massive creeper who tries to get with every chick so I was promptly taken away.
Some chick who’s a close friend of the FB guy told me that I was the hottest thing to happen to him in her opinion (she was smashed, lol, and has tried to hook up with me… Has a bf) AND apparently the dude had told her that I was the best thing that happened to him and he still liked me but he had to stop because of circumstances which were discussed later on (and I understand completely)…
^ Gave me an idea and so the quest to get my ~friend~ drunk started, went back to his, got him drunker and drunker. I kept telling him I needed him drunk in order for me to ask and say something. He agreed and started to get really curious. We go back to the party, chill outside. FB guy comes over and I just hang around my ~friend~ and I brushed my hand past his behind some person who was in between us and he ended up holding it but let go and looked at me and smiled and patted me on the shoulder… WAT, not drunk enough because why hold my hand. Then at some point we met a friend who moved away and he had picked her up (she’s tiny – my height and Asian - and he’s tall, lol) and I was like, aw you never carry me! All sad faced, and he was like you never glomp me or let me carry you! And then yeah, he carried me around.
I think it was straight after that, where we both were like okay, more alcohol for him… We went back and we spoke in the lounge, friend (very gay, very controversial friend) walked in, saw us and walked straight out very, very awkwardly. Then I was worrying about what he’d tell people and ~friend~ was like does it matter what they think? At which point I was like
… I thought YOU would care?
At which he was like, let’s go to my room, if it makes you feel better. (OKAY!)
We go to his room, get him to drink a bit more, then he said now’s the best time to tell him or he’ll have memory blanks later on if he drinks more… So I basically, oh lord… I don’t quite remember how things happened the way they did, but I remember totally going all, lemme teach u stuff, since he used to suck at kissing and had no whatsoever idea on what to do with da womenz. Even though he’s the one with the experience, DERP, awkward as fuck.
So we hook up. And keep hooking up. Till I go, THIS IS CONFUSING ME STAHP.
He’s like why? I say, I’m brown… w0t u duen. U like whites and goff gurls. BOTH together if better.
Iunno, I just remember saying that many, many times, till I got an answer from him. He said, (something along these lines) “You don’t understand… I said white and/or goff gurls…”
Me: “w0t mean?!!1” Him: “And/or! OR!”
I’m slowly getting it and go but I’m brown… You really don’t like brown chicks… You said, that only very very EXTREMELY rarely are there exceptional and they’d have to be amazingly exceptional… And even then I’M BROWN and OOGLAY. *laffs*
Him: There are exceptions… And you’re one of them. You showed me that I contradict myself and you keep saying you’re brown like it matters to me. And you already know what I’ll say about you being “ugly”…
Me: wat… Umm… I don’ know what to say but okay let’s just make out now.
^ I actually don’t remember how I responded, probably just kissed him because it was sweet and shiz.
Lol, okay, that happens. Then we have another talk later and he asks me about why I needed him drunk, if it was just to hook up again and that’s when I told him that I liked him, and he then told me that he had liked me as well, but he wasn’t sure which is why the awkward shit happened the way it did and he was sorry. He told me he had liked me since Thursday but he was confused and stuff and didn’t know how to deal with it because he’s so socially awkward.
I say it’s fine and I said that we don’t need to tell anyone until we’re sure. And it was his choice if he wanted to because I told him that we both wanted relationships and we had both agreed before that it’s best to be friends before dating. Spoke about how we were already cuddle buddies and stuff.
Then we cuddled and shiz and fell asleep. Cuddled and drifted, usual shit, more couple-y.
In the morning, he told me that everything he said was true and wanted to clarify it with me whilst being sober so I wouldn’t think he was horny or whatever. I said I was too. Asked how it would affect our friendship and that he didn’t want to lose it, that he didn’t want to hurt me and that he was worried about our friendship if we break up. He was also concerned about my friendship with my other bestfriend/sis who’s his ~ex~ (failed attempt of a gf, ended brutally).
I reassured him, and said it’d work out and stuff. Then he told me that he’s going to need me to distance myself from him for 1-2 weeks to see how he deals with that and to see if he likes me still, and I agreed and said that I know how he has dealt with things before, having been there to help him and shiz. Said to still be all friendly but to spend less time around him. Later he said he found it amusing how I was still wearing his shirt. :3
This distance thing tho. I’m worried that he’s going to lose interest. Or talk himself out, or I don’t know! Something. ><
Asked sis today and she said she remembers this stage and that was when he dumped her and came crawling back the next week because he wasn’t sure of his feelings.
She keeps telling me how he never used to cuddle her, or share his blankets and shiz with her and finds it surprising that he does all of these things with me when all we’d done before was cuddle and just sleep together when they had done more.
And she’s tried to teach him how to kiss but he could never do it right or listen to her, yet with me, he learnt and stuck to it. She’s very, very pessimistic about him but supports me if I continue and go into a possible relationship with him…
TL;DR
I don’t know how to shorten this, someone du 4 meh if possible? :3