I'm exercising my morals. It's not like i make out with every guy i see. Actually im more controlled than most heterosexual peoples =P. You know, i didnt have my first kiss til these holidays just gone? This is because i used to repress my sexuality, i actually liked a girl, but i was depressed, had low self esteem. I didnt really like her because i wanted to, i liked her because i gave myself no alternative- there wasnt even any physical attraction, it was just emotional.
It wasnt until a few years later that i was accepting myself, and i actually fell for a guy. I thought that if this is who i am, this is who i am. I cannot repress it, no matter how hard i try, and i dont want to repress it. I started feeling better about myself, and everyone made me feel normal when i told them, more normal than i felt pretending to be heterosexual.
The problem is that only i know how i feel, though i know if anyone else was in my shoes they'd do the same, either that or kill themselves (which is also a sin, so noone seems to be able to win).