Social Anxiety. Public Speaking, Oral presentations etc. Help. (1 Viewer)

[ShadowLighte]

Hey guys, I'm a Year 11-ner and I guess you'd think that by now I'd be used to doing speeches or presentations in front of the class because I've done so for do long and for every subject. Haha, I wish. It's come to the point where I had to go to a counsellor for my social anxiety. Yeah, it's absolutely horrible and it hinders my ability to socialise and enjoy life in general. I've always been the quiet one, always, and my family just say that I'm shy. No one -as in friends or family- knows that I social anxiety which is the reason why I don't go out or talk much. It's like, I really want to go out and enjoy myself and talk to friends about whatever pops into my mind but I can't without fearing that they will judge me and insult me and break me apart etc. etc. I think you have an idea of what I've been going through and perhaps you've experienced it yourself or know someone who does. It's frustrating but I have to find a way to cope.

I have two oral presentations coming up. And I am freaking out. They're due on the same day too. This coming Friday. I really need help with this. Just thinking about it now is making my heart beat quite rapidly and I'm all tense and my palms are sweating. Just thinking about it. So imagine me actually on the day, there, just waiting for my name to be called. I just hope I don't have a panic attack.

I need ways to cope, even for a bit. I've suffered this all my life though when I was younger, even though I was scared, I still did it because I when I was young, people didn't judge, we were young and most of us didn't really care about people's flaws and such. But now, especially as a teenager we're all much more self conscious and my fear just grows as time passes. It came to the point where I asked for zeros.
I asked for zeros.
I could probably get a just passing mark but I'd much rather get a zero than to feel such an experience.

Because I'm in Year 11, it's nearly the end and Year 12 is coming up fast, I can't ask for zeros because the marks are too important. Plus, I'm getting older and soon I'll be out of school in the real world where there is no such thing as asking for zeros. Please, if anyone has any ideas or coping mechanisms. What I'm thinking of now is treating myself on Friday after school until the morning after. I'm not sure what to do though, perhaps go for a swim if i can. But at the very moment, should I imagine the room as if no one's there or something? I think it would help to imagine something to relax myself but I don't know what. If you have any advice or even just to tell me your experience with public speaking, please leave a reply, it would be much appreciated as I feel like I have some rare disease.

 

[-may-cat-]

I had the same issue for many years, and still do to a degree. A big part of it for me was that i would blush very deeply around my chest, neck, ears etc. Knowing that people could see how nervous i was made me more nervous and blush more and it was just awful. I now make sure i always wear my hair down to cover my ears, wear a nice scarf that covers my chest etc. before a big presentation at uni or work. Knowing that people can't see the physical manifestation of my nerves makes me feel more confident.

 

[JT145]

Hiya.

I used to suffer from this kinda stuff too. All through Primary School (and a little way into Secondary) I was paranoid about doing public speaking and doing public stuff in general. Like yourself I was paranoid about people judging me and insulting me. I've been there.

(note. Don't want to sound sexist here but I think girls have it harder than guys. But I'll keep going).

However I realised a few years ago that no one really cares about your public speaking. Now I know that sounds really bad but it's just a speech for school. The only person delivering meaningful feedback will be the teachers. No one will remember what your speech was like about 2 hours after the speech. There is nothing to be embarrassed about.

I'm guessing that even though you're introverted you'll have a few close friends. When you've finished preparing your speech get a few of your close friends to come in and listen to you speak. Just get an audience that will support you, helps in learning your speech and delivering it.

It helps massively if you've learnt your speech a few times beforehand and you're not spending all your time looking down at your palm cards (just divide up your speech into hand sized text boxes on Word). Print them out, close the door to your room, look at something and speak to it. A bit of public speaking comes down to technique. If you know your speech well enough hopefully you'll be able to look down at the sentence you've written, know what you're gonna say, look up and then say the entire (or most of) the sentence. Eye contact with your audience is important even though they aren't necessarily looking at you.

My friends say I have something like a newsreader voice. That's essentially sounding like a newsreader: accents, emphasis on some words. This also comes through a strong enunciation of words. This isn't something you'll be able to learn overnight though. I don't really know how I managed to get this trait.

Last term I had 3 oral presentations due in the same week, two in the same day (a 4 minute and a 10 minuter). So I've done stuff like this before. It's okay

If you still need help I'll try and record myself speaking my Modern History speech from last term. It's 5 minutes.