Rules for Customers (5 Viewers)

[supercalamari]

Ok im pretty sure most of these will have be said already but i cbb reading 200pages. THis is for retail:
*See that big sign that says three items or less? Well it not a decorations you're meant to pay attention to it, if 4 items were acceptable it would say 4 items or less wouldn't it
*Like the baove just because there are two of you doesn't mean it is acceptable to bring in 6items, likewise multiple items of the same type don't count as 1 item, we don't have a quantity button on normal checkouts.
*When it's busy don't let your little precious children pay for their shitty toys separately and hold up the rest of the line.
*It says swipe or insert your card. THe machine doesn't know what type of card you have an neither do i unless you show it to me, so don't get annoyed when you do it the wrong way.
*YOur not fuckign disabled learn to swipe your card yourself we have more pressing issues to attend to
*Ask for cashout before you swipe your card
*If you have a problem with the price tell us before you pay for it
*No i'm serving customers, you can't return that item here, how bout you go to the desk with the big sign saying returns here
*its not my fault you can't read the sign that says, we accept Everyday Rewards cards here, if you were to stupid to miss it well deal with it, you'll remember for next time i hope
*NO i won't give you 50 one dollar coins, go to a fucking bank
*nor will i accept 50 dollars worth of silver shrapnel
*the shop is close dno you can not come in
*You don't know me don't use the name on my badge most of the time i've switched it, do your eally think my name is manfred?
*Don't try and scan your discount card yourself, i am capable of doing that myself
*I'm sorry we don't accept credit on your debit cards anymore, but do you really htink im secretly the head of Big W? yelling at me isnt going to change anything?
*No we don't accept westfield cards! i don't give a shit if its a special one that says it will be accepted anywhere eftpos is avaliable, if you read the card it says we don't need to accept it
*Again i can't change the fact that our EFTPOS machines wont accept your westfield card, don't complain to me
*NO i don't give a shit if youar enot satisfied, at the end of the dya i still get paid
*Dont ask for 400bucks in cash go to the fuckign atm thats is 5 metres away
*Do you seriosulsy need a bag for your giftbag??
*Yes the plastic bags are free, that doesnt mean you can take as many as you want

I feel your pain

Red Rooster and Drive Thrus

1. dont be suprised if you dont get a refund because you changed your mind
2. dont say large rooster roll when you dont want a meal. it only comes in one size.
3. a classic roast is not a whole chicken. so stop bringing in your buy 1 get 1 free coupons and expect to get 2 whole chickens.
4. its bad enough getting heaps of coins but i dont need the lint and random hairs from your pocket too.
5. dont put your kids on the counter if they are perfectly capable of standing. whats wrong with the floor?
6. if you want a certain piece of chicken, thats fine but dont ask for it when im about to hand you your order. that goes for no salt on chips too.
7. no you cant get coleslaw instead of the mash n gravy in the big deal.
8. its not cute when kids put greasy handprints on the doors or windows.
9. you cant make up your own price for a meal. pay the set price or go somewhere else.
10. dont shout at the box 'hello hello?' in a naggy voice and not know what you want to order
11. let the driver of the car order. i cant hear you passenger.
12. sorry could you repeat that? your screaming child, barking dog and terrible music is making it hard for me to hear you.
13. dont drive straight through to the window and ask me about every item we have. thats what the menu board is for. reverse your car and order at the box.
14. dont park so far away from the window and put your hand out a little bit so that i have to jump out of the window just to reach you
15. the lights are off. the chairs are stacked. the doors are locked. Yes we are closed.

My store is a 24 hour store so we never have number 15.

Here is my latest list of complaints:

1. Like melizzle and tom_swell said, keep your children on the damn ground. Don't plonk them on the counter, which I just cleaned. I will ask you to put them on the floor, because 99.99% of the time they try and climb over the counter. If they DO climb over the counter, I will not touch them, you can come around and get them yourself.

2. HAVE YOUR MONEY READY WHEN YOU GET TO THE WINDOW. I do NOT have enough time to wait for you to count 5c coins individually. Also, let the driver count them money, don't make the passenger count it and then the driver recount it, because I have to count it too.

3. DON'T drive away before I give you a receipt. If your money is under the amount needed, I won't press 'paid', therefore you won't get your food at the next window. They'll make you drive back around to pay the right money.

If your money is more then what is needed and you drive away, I'll put your change in the Ronald McDonald House box.

4. Don't ask for a hash brown, a small coffee and an egg and bacon muffin. It's called a Bacon and Egg Muffin Meal. Specify which damn coffee you want and any sugars, I don't read minds.

5. Let the driver order.

6. If your passengers, screaming baby, crappy music and engine were quieter, I might be able to hear you.

7. Choose what you want BEFORE you get to the speaker box.

8. WE DO NOT ALTER VALUE PICK ITEMS. No you can't have the Mighty Muffin without cheese or with extra sausage. Head Office makes those rules up, not me. We just follow them. Don't complain that the other store lets you have it your way. We're not Burger King, go there instead.

9. No, my name is not really Edward, Splodge or Christmas Cake. I'm not telling you what it actually is, either.

10. I'll smile if I want to. Don't ask for one.

11. If you try and flirt with me, I'll shut my window on you. Same goes for people who swear at me.

 

[bdude]

9. No, my name is not really Edward, Splodge or Christmas Cake. I'm not telling you what it actually is, either.

I know what it is

 

[supercalamari]

I know what it is

Of course

 

[Chemical Ali]

People from who shop at Woolworths:

*Please Don't lean over my register to scan your EDR card, I will scan it for you If you hand it to me

void it for the lolz

 

[babikakez]

And to supervisors who send these people to express, I want you to DIE!

we only do this so you don't have to go out on a main

void it for the lolz

fucking brilliant idea.

 

[spence]

I feel your pain




My store is a 24 hour store so we never have number 15.

Here is my latest list of complaints:

1. Like melizzle and tom_swell said, keep your children on the damn ground. Don't plonk them on the counter, which I just cleaned. I will ask you to put them on the floor, because 99.99% of the time they try and climb over the counter. If they DO climb over the counter, I will not touch them, you can come around and get them yourself.

2. HAVE YOUR MONEY READY WHEN YOU GET TO THE WINDOW. I do NOT have enough time to wait for you to count 5c coins individually. Also, let the driver count them money, don't make the passenger count it and then the driver recount it, because I have to count it too.

3. DON'T drive away before I give you a receipt. If your money is under the amount needed, I won't press 'paid', therefore you won't get your food at the next window. They'll make you drive back around to pay the right money.

If your money is more then what is needed and you drive away, I'll put your change in the Ronald McDonald House box.

4. Don't ask for a hash brown, a small coffee and an egg and bacon muffin. It's called a Bacon and Egg Muffin Meal. Specify which damn coffee you want and any sugars, I don't read minds.

5. Let the driver order.

6. If your passengers, screaming baby, crappy music and engine were quieter, I might be able to hear you.

7. Choose what you want BEFORE you get to the speaker box.

8. WE DO NOT ALTER VALUE PICK ITEMS. No you can't have the Mighty Muffin without cheese or with extra sausage. Head Office makes those rules up, not me. We just follow them. Don't complain that the other store lets you have it your way. We're not Burger King, go there instead.

9. No, my name is not really Edward, Splodge or Christmas Cake. I'm not telling you what it actually is, either.

10. I'll smile if I want to. Don't ask for one.

11. If you try and flirt with me, I'll shut my window on you. Same goes for people who swear at me.

Isn't maccas awesome?

Number 8 is a weird one, we do it at our store and head office is across the road. But most other stores don't let you

 

[brookie94]

we only do this so you don't have to go out on a main

yeh but our store has like 1 person serving on express, maybe 2. So it's a pain in the ass, and there's no room for all their crap either lol

 

[MissedThePoint]

- Your item is worth $6. You pay with a $50 note. Don't get pissed when your change is in $5 notes or smaller: every other asshole did the same thing as you, so I have nothing bigger left.

 

[supercalamari]

Isn't maccas awesome?

Number 8 is a weird one, we do it at our store and head office is across the road. But most other stores don't let you

I don't like the rule, personally. I think it sucks. But my store manager insists on it being enforced, and he scares me so I'm not going to argue about it. If people get annoyed I just offer to grab the shift supervisor for them. Can't be bothered arguing with fools

- Your item is worth $6. You pay with a $50 note. Don't get pissed when your change is in $5 notes or smaller: every other asshole did the same thing as you, so I have nothing bigger left.

This one too. Sometimes I will do it to intentionally piss you off, but only if you were rude to me. It's my draw, I'll do it my way.

 

[babikakez]

- Your item is worth $6. You pay with a $50 note. Don't get pissed when your change is in $5 notes or smaller: every other asshole did the same thing as you, so I have nothing bigger left.

Whenever I have customers pay for a $5 or less item with a $50 (which is often as I'm only ever in express) I make sure they get the full EDR spiel - including "would you like one?". Serves them right.

 

[Chemical Ali]

Whenever I have customers pay for a $5 or less item with a $50 (which is often as I'm only ever in express) I make sure they get the full EDR spiel - including "would you like one?". Serves them right.

idea noted and will implement next time on checkouts

EDIT: or the same for the relevant loyalty card of the company for which i work, which may or may not be affiliated with woolworths limited

 

[SSRabbitohs2009]

I know this has been said a million times (as it should be) but

DON'T SPEAK ON YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MOBILE WHILST ORDERING SOMETHING AND THEN COMPLAIN THAT I GAVE YOU THE WRONG ORDER WHEN ALL I GET ARE FRAGMENTS OF YOUR REQUEST ie. 'blahblahblah--white block--blahblahblah--toast--NOIWANTEDWITHSESAMESEEDS!'

 

[babikakez]

idea noted and will implement next time on checkouts

EDIT: or the same for the relevant loyalty card of the company for which i work, which may or may not be affiliated with woolworths limited

lol, where do you work?

 

[Chemical Ali]

lol, where do you work?

a discount department store named after a letter of the alphabet

 

[babikakez]

a discount department store named after a letter of the alphabet

haha i see

 

[Chemical Ali]

in the section which allows people to "by" [sic] things they can't afford -_-

actually the scare quotes should probably go around "people"

 

[killer-cupcakes]

Customers please don't:

*Ask me If I work at the store when you see me standing behind a register serving somebody. (No I just stand behind the register and serve people for fun!)

*Don't ask me, when I am walking to my car placing my groceries in my car and ask Me can you show them where something is (This happened to me yesterday!)

*Don't swipe your EDR card yourself when I have my back turned, don't think your so clever you did it.

 

[supercalamari]

I know this has been said a million times (as it should be) but

DON'T SPEAK ON YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MOBILE WHILST ORDERING SOMETHING AND THEN COMPLAIN THAT I GAVE YOU THE WRONG ORDER WHEN ALL I GET ARE FRAGMENTS OF YOUR REQUEST ie. 'blahblahblah--white block--blahblahblah--toast--NOIWANTEDWITHSESAMESEEDS!'

Hahaha, the number of people who ring up their partner/kids and ask them what they want when they're in the drive thru... and then proceed to have a fight about their orders. Hilarious

Customers please don't:

*Ask me If I work at the store when you see me standing behind a register serving somebody. (No I just stand behind the register and serve people for fun!)

*Don't ask me, when I am walking to my car placing my groceries in my car and ask Me can you show them where something is (This happened to me yesterday!)

*Don't swipe your EDR card yourself when I have my back turned, don't think your so clever you did it.

Oh I know...
"What can I get for you?"
"Oh, you're open?"
"Uh...."

 

[CieL]

Let me set the scene:
At the front desk which doubles up as the kiosk + conveyor belt registers which is right at the entrance of the store.

Tiny bitch walks in and asks if we do cash out only. I apologise and state that ever since we got an ATM machine in the store we cannot do cash out alone and that a purchase will be required to get extra cash.

Bitch: So I can't just get cashout?
Me: No sorry *points to machine in corner again*
Bitch: So can I get like gum or something?
Me: Yeah sure of course!
Bitch: *stands there motionless* So can I get some gum?
Me: *also stands there motionless*
===awkward silence===
Me: Do you want to get it yourself?

Then she gives me a deathstare and asks me where the gum is. I tell her it's in aisle 7 and are also available on the ends of some registers and point her there.

The fuck does she think I am. A gum slave? I work at the front of the store and I'm nowhere near the confectionary aisle nor is it convenient for me to travel 10m to the closest register with a confec shelf so she can have her gum to get her cashout.

What if I do travel 10m to get her some gum and it's not the right flavour or brand =/
I ain't psychic bitch!

 

[supercalamari]

Gahh CieL, cash out is the WORST.

People always want it in certain denominations- no, get lost, it's my draw and I'll give you a fifty dollar note if I've got ten fifties and only two twenties and two tens in there.

People always want to exchange fifty dollar notes for smaller amounts without purchases, too- do I look like a bank? No. I don't change notes for smaller change. Ever.

Also, customers who request the manager when I tell them we've stopped serving breakfast. It's 10:30am. I don't CARE how busy your morning was, how late you slept in or if you were in the queue before 10:29. You only had like FIVE HOURS to get here in time. NOT MY PROBLEM.

Also, people who ask for the 'Good News Breakfast' and 'Mighty Big Breakfast'. Lololololol. You people make me giggle.