@Dazed: yep, I know you weren't having a go at me.
That's why I said: "I had read your post before the marks ever came out"
(I remember you talking about those making a big deal, if you don't tell people it's even more of a big deal, since you're not "conforming" - I know that wasn't your choice of words, but you know what I mean
).
I wasn't offended or anything, I knew what you were saying and where you were coming from. I really feel as though I have to check them, because of all the pressure now (everyone here, at home, in public).
@vanity: you're very kind,