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Do you change or stay true? Breakup effect on formal? (1 Viewer)

bubz :D

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if you and your gf break up before your formal, and are still friends, then it's up to you two to decide whether or not you're still going to eachother's formals. unfortunately we can't really help you on whether you "should" or not. and if you already have a new girlfriend/boyfriend, then you really need to talk to both of them about it. both girls/boys would be hurt, somewhat, if you take the other

however, if i'd asked my friend to go to my formal, and then got a boyfriend, there's no way i would tell my friend "sorry mate, i'd rather take my boyfriend than you", even if my boyfriend disapproved. to me, it's like planning that friend's birthday for months and months, and then you suddenly get a boyfriend and ditch your friend that night.
 

Dreamerish*~

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Adimus said:
Ok just wondering, if your going out with someone and decide to go to the formal with eachother, and then yu break up, but on good terms and are still friends, and then later start going out with someone else, would you/should you go to the formal with the girl you used to go out with as you have already agreed to do it, or go with your new bf/gf as you'd rather go with them, and breaking up SHOULD mean that prior commitments are void. ????

Also, if you areange to go to a formal with a friend, and then suddenly get a bf/gf, should you/would you go to the formal with your friend as you already arranged it, or your new bf/gf as they are your partner and u would rather go with them???.....
When you break up with someone, you're not still responsiple for all the promises you made to do things together as boyfriend and girlfriend. When you planned to go to the formal together, it was as a couple. Now that you have broken up, you are just friends. If you go out with someone else, your previous relationship should not stand in the way of your new one, because this would create the impression to your new girlfriend that you are still not over your ex.

However, it's different with friends. If you have already arranged to go with a friend, ditching him/her at the last minute for a new boyfriend is unacceptable.
 

Frigid

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mummydreamerish, would you mind turning that multi-clausal convoluted paragraph into plain-english?
 

chelzmalee

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As I recall, at my formal alot of that happened.

Most couples stayed true to their word and took the ex anyway, as they'd already made the commitment, and suits/dresses had been chosen etc etc etc.
 

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Frigid said:
mummydreamerish, would you mind turning that multi-clausal convoluted paragraph into plain-english?
No problemo, Frig. ;) I did it already, but my computer crashed just when I clicked "submit". :(

I was just wondering - if you were going out with someone and had arranged to take them to the formal during the time when you were together, would you still go with them after you've broken up, and started seeing someone else?

Seeing as breaking up should mean that prior committments become void, should you stick to your word, or do what you really want - that is, go to the formal with your new girl/guy?

Also, if you have already arranged to go to the formal with a friend, but a new boyfriend/girlfriend made you change your mind - you want to be with them instead - is it right to change your plans, would you change your plans if that was the case?


That was harder than I thought. When I read it, I just skimmed through and grasped the general idea. :rolleyes: All that tautology totally killed me.
 

Frigid

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Dreamerish*~ said:
I was just wondering - if you were going out with someone and had arranged to take them to the formal during the time when you were together, would you still go with them after you've broken up, and started seeing someone else?

Seeing as breaking up should mean that prior committments become void, should you stick to your word, or do what you really want - that is, go to the formal with your new girl/guy?

Also, if you have already arranged to go to the formal with a friend, but a new boyfriend/girlfriend made you change your mind - you want to be with them instead - is it right to change your plans, would you change your plans if that was the case?
the short and sweet: formals are overrated.

but, as always, each case should be decided on its own merits - the post ex facto relationship with the ex, the current relationship, the feelings of all parties etc. i don't think there's a general solution. :)
 

vintage

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Ok just wondering, if your going out with someone and decide to go to the formal with eachother, and then yu break up, but on good terms and are still friends, and then later start going out with someone else, would you/should you go to the formal with the girl you used to go out with as you have already agreed to do it, or go with your new bf/gf as you'd rather go with them, and breaking up SHOULD mean that prior commitments are void. ????

Oh my god... that kinda happened to me before the prom!
Go with the girl you used to go out with... unless shes going out with someone else too. or else it really hurts her if you dont go with her...



Also, if you areange to go to a formal with a friend, and then suddenly get a bf/gf, should you/would you go to the formal with your friend as you already arranged it, or your new bf/gf as they are your partner and u would rather go with them???.....
you should talk to that "friend" about it... see how he/she feels?
 

braad

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stay true?

jim beam baby, jim beam
 
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nah you gotta go with the chick you used to go out with, the new one can deal cos you promised the old one and you gotta stay true to your word

trust me, this happened to me with my boy, he took his ex and i was totally cool with it, even when she hit on him

if its a friend i think it depends how close you are. i mean, you'd generally have a better time with a close friend then a new-ish partner i think. if you want to take your partner tho, have a chat to your friend cos they're bound to understand. Then again, its a bit like one rule for you one rule for me with the above situation in mind - if you promise, stick to your word.
 

sped_kid01

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personally, if i was still friends with the ex, i would take him, i didnt take my bf to my formal!

formal partners arent about who ur in love with, i think they are about ur mates...

i would have rathered go with my best guy friend, rather than my bf, hat doesnt mean i love my bf any less, thats just how it went!
 

Dreamerish*~

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ella_fitzgerald said:
nah you gotta go with the chick you used to go out with, the new one can deal cos you promised the old one and you gotta stay true to your word

trust me, this happened to me with my boy, he took his ex and i was totally cool with it, even when she hit on him

if its a friend i think it depends how close you are. i mean, you'd generally have a better time with a close friend then a new-ish partner i think. if you want to take your partner tho, have a chat to your friend cos they're bound to understand. Then again, its a bit like one rule for you one rule for me with the above situation in mind - if you promise, stick to your word.
My boyfriend is my best friend. Any close guy friend I would ever have (not that I have any :() would not get any closer to me than my boyfriend, so I don't really have a problem with taking him.

An ex shouldn't really stop you from doing what you want to do - taking a new boyfriend/girlfriend being no exception. Whatever you promised them was done at a time when you were in love with them. I know it sounds quite slack, but after a relationship has ended, all those sweet nothings should not be regarded as contracts which when broken will cost $$$.
 

Serius

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yeah tel lthe ex to fuck off, its not like you are going out with her anymore so she gets no say in what you do with your life. take your new girlfriend, girlfriend is definately more important than ex. thaty said if she wasnt your ex and was justa friend i would say mates before dates.
 
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i think you have to consider the ex in the situation! if you've promised something to someone its much nicer to keep your word about it then to break it, especially if you've already broken their heart!
 
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you could always take them both :) havent broken a promise... still taking your partner... everyone wins. I mean your ex would prolly only wanna come as a mate and for the afterparty anywhoo... and you and your new partner can have a good time to.
 

millzsta

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clearly you cant take both if you only have one other ticket... just to point that out...
 
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that happend 2 months b4 my year 10 fromal and i still went with my ex. we were still friends and it all turned out ok.

it really depends on if u stay friends or not. if u dont like the person then obviouly u wouldnt take them.

and with the friend, if u decide to go with months b4 the formal then u get a girl u tell them then that u want to go with the girl, but if its not long till the formal then i would stay with my friend.
 

NosaJ

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i think it depends on the situation.
like if a girl broke up with you for no particular reason then couldn't find a date and expects you to just go along when she snaps her fingers then thats a bit wrong.
 

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