Deferring - Wise or unwise? (1 Viewer)

[kadeekay]

Being in a long distance relationship for about a year now and having only seen my boyfriend a few times during the course of it, I'm considering the option of 'Deferment' - taking a year off to spend living with my boy in Newcastle and working (probably at some cruddy retail outlet- not that I can knock cruddy retail outlets because I have worked at one for nearly 4 years).

Anyhoo! Whilst I realise there is a University at Newcastle, it doesn't facilitate the particular courses that I'd be interested in So I have applied for other courses in Universities in NSW, Vic and SA. However, if I get into Uni elsewhere then I'll have to spend a good three to four years doing the whole long-distance relationship crap again, hence my consideration for deferment. If I can defer for a year, then at least I can breakup the big chunk of living apart for 4 or 5 years.. right?

The thing is, numerous people have suggested to me that deferring is a poor option - that once you start working, you won't want to go back to studying again. I'm not a psychic, but I believe that it is most unlikely that I would share this train of thought.

Is there anyone out there who has deferred and returned smoothly and happily? Can anyone suggest reasons why I should/shouldn't defer?

 

[hipsta_jess]

I came straight to uni from school, and I don't think any of us can advise you whether or not it is wise to defer, that is a decision you need to make for yourself, we don't know you or what you're like. Some people need a year off, whereas others take the time off and then don't ever get into it (whether or not that is a bad thing is a different debate)
Personally, I think deferring for a boy is a poor reason, particularly if you've only been together for a year and have only seen each other a few times, but thats only my opinion...I guess a compromise would be to enter a similar degree to what you want to do at Newcastle, or a more generic one, and try to do some similar units to get credit for if you decide to transfer to another uni?

 

[PrincessSJ]

The success of your deferment will depend on how much you want to get back to study!

I agree with Jess its not the best reason to be deferring for a boy, but on the same token, having just gotten into what looks like its going to be a long distance relationship, I can understand your want to be with him for a while..

What course do you want to get into? Perhaps Newy has something you can get credit for somewhere else, so that you don't have to work in a cruddy retail outlet (cause that would be torture for a whole year!)

I think I have totally re-iterated what Jess said.. oh well.. good luck!
SJ

 

[mrbassman]

1. hmm why would you post here?

2. What happens if you defer and break up? living together and trying to earn money can be stressful.

3. as Jess said thats a shithouse reason for deferring

4. if you deferred would you be able to stop earning money(or less) and be able to start studying harder than for ur hsc?

5. Sure deferring is successful if you are highly committed to ur career but then why defer in the first place.

sorry to be negative but, the only reasons ive heard is
a) you flogged your guts out for hsc and nearly broke down
b) someone is paying for you to travel (i wish but it happens)
c) health - your/family
d) job in your chosen field

anyway goodluck with whatever you choose, what does you 'boy' think? is he forcing you towrds a decision? look at those things as well before you choose. you also actually have to sit your hsc as well good luck

 

[bscienceboi]

Deferring....it IS hard to get back to study and study habits. (The post-HSC holidays literally screwed my mind when I first got to University).

If you DO plan on deferring and getting a job, then make sure that the job you apply for relates to your degree

 

[clive]

i wish i deferred.

 

[smegthehead]

one of my friends deferred and wishes she hadn't. She has this notion that she's forgetting all the stuff she used to know, which in itself is quite funny as she is also smarter than me.

 

[aim54x]

well i went straight to UNi this yr and am still tryin to get back into a studyin rythmn. i go with jess, def don;t defer for a bou cause it ain't worth it, maybe u could get him to move closer to u???

 

[em_516]

when do you tell the uni that you're deferring? because i reckon you should see how you go in the 3 months after the hsc before you decide..

 

[PrincessSJ]

you don't have to tell them you're deferring until the cut-off date for accepting your offer. (So if you get a main round offer, i think that would be before the late round offers so they can work out how many places they have etc etc)

buts its not for ages yet.

 

[kadeekay]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts, I'm trying to gather up as much advice as possible! It's been valuable to get some outside opinions.
Well Jess, I've applied for a few 'generic' degrees at Uni of Newcastle. I think they're sort-of up my alley so hopefully that'll work out and I can get credit if I transfer - which is probable, as my boyfriend is in the raaf and likely to get posted to a new base within the next 3 - 5 years. So thanks for that

I do realise how naive me wanting to drop everything for a year and live with a guy I've never lived with nor spent much face-to-face time with sounds... and I realise that the future is unpredictable and we could split (making deferment sound like a REALLY bad option) but unless you've been in a long-distance relationship before, you probably won't be able to fully appreciate where I'm coming from. However, the more I think about it the more hesitant I am about deferring. So if I don't get into Uni of Newcastle but I get in elsewhere I think the wiser choice would be to go elsewhere. There's always holidays

MrBassman- my boyfriend says he'll still be there for me regardless of what I end up doing.. which is a nice thought but it's easy to say that now isn't it? He was pretty distraught when I first told him I might not be living with him next year, but it all seems to be good now. Thanks for your advice.

Anyway, the only thing I can do really is see how I go in the hsc and take it from
there! Thanks again for your comments

 

[kadeekay]

Oh and aim54x, I live in Broken Hill which is an isolated city (if you could call it that- there is just under 20 000 people living here) in far west NSW about 500 kms from Adelaide and about 1200 kms from Sydney. We have no University here and the nearest raaf base is in Adelaide so unfortunately there isn't much chance of me staying and him moving closer to me. Besides, it's a hole and I want to get out! lol