Creative Writing URGENT HELP! (1 Viewer)

[Mr_Kap]

Ok. I am trying to write in my short story:

It was an extremely hot day and I was sweating, and the room had an unpleasant stench (because my character is in a nursing home with old people).


I am struggling of coming up with a way to write this in my short story, so I can SHOW not tell.


It's urgent, so any help would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Mr_Kap]

am dying inside. Just need this one line and then I'm done. Been thinking all day and i can't figure out a way to write this.

 

[RecklessRick]

It was an extremely hot day and I was sweating, and the room had an unpleasant stench (because i am in a nursing home with old people).

that sounds awful you should open a window or something

 

[Mr_Kap]

that sounds awful you should open a window or something

lol. My character is not going to go an open a window. It sets the atmosphere.

 

[RecklessRick]

Legit though to answer the question think about what you feel when you're hot and what you smell when there's an awful stench in the air. Try and capture the emotions and feelings associated with the conditions you're trying to represent rather than just saying the conditions themselves. For example "my clothes stuck obstinately to my damp body as my eyes burned from the salt of the slowly dripping droplets that tracked down my forehead." Probably not that long and convoluted but you get my drift.

 

[teridax]

Legit though to answer the question think about what you feel when you're hot and what you smell when there's an awful stench in the air. Try and capture the emotions and feelings associated with the conditions you're trying to represent rather than just saying the conditions themselves. For example "my clothes stuck obstinately to my damp body as my eyes burned from the salt of the slowly dripping droplets that tracked down my forehead." Probably not that long and convoluted but you get my drift.

How would one adapt their prememorised creative writing piece to a new stimulus though?

 

[Mr_Kap]

Legit though to answer the question think about what you feel when you're hot and what you smell when there's an awful stench in the air. Try and capture the emotions and feelings associated with the conditions you're trying to represent rather than just saying the conditions themselves. For example "my clothes stuck obstinately to my damp body as my eyes burned from the salt of the slowly dripping droplets that tracked down my forehead." Probably not that long and convoluted but you get my drift.

alright, thx. ill have another think on how i can write it.

 

[Mr_Kap]

How would one adapt their prememorised creative writing piece to a new stimulus though?

Its not that hard. Just practice with a lot of questions and you will learn that you an keep around 80-85% of your memorised essay.

 

[Flop21]

Ok. I am trying to write in my short story:

It was an extremely hot day and I was sweating, and the room had an unpleasant stench (because my character is in a nursing home with old people).


I am struggling of coming up with a way to write this in my short story, so I can SHOW not tell.


It's urgent, so any help would be greatly appreciated.

The hot air whipped my face like an alligator slapping its tail. The sweat poured from my forehead onto the tiles, each drop sizzling as it hit the ground. The stench of death penetrated my nostrils as I took a deep breath.

 

[Mr_Kap]

The hot air whipped my face like an alligator slapping its tail. The sweat poured from my forehead onto the tiles, each drop sizzling as it hit the ground. The stench of death penetrated my nostrils as I took a deep breath.

nice. Do you mind if I use that?

I'm sorry but that simile is overboard..hahah. lol

 

[Flop21]

nice. Do you mind if I use that?

I'm sorry but that simile is overboard..hahah. lol

HahahahA, I was actually just joking around. But yeah go ahead.

But surely someone else better at writing can help you out here? If I come up with something good I'll post it here.

 

[sy37]

The sweat soaked the clothes on my back creating what seemed to be like a map. It even drizzled down my eyes and stung me with its salty make up. Unbelievably, what had stung my eyes even more was this characteristic old people stench, it made a parody of the fresh air outside. Something something moms spaghetti.

*Ignore the last sentence

 

[Yeungster]

Ok. I am trying to write in my short story:

It was an extremely hot day and I was sweating, and the room had an unpleasant stench (because my character is in a nursing home with old people).


I am struggling of coming up with a way to write this in my short story, so I can SHOW not tell.


It's urgent, so any help would be greatly appreciated.

My eyelids watered as the putrid stench wafted through the air that wobbled in the heat. Nek minit i shat.