BOS Showcase: 2007 Major Works (1 Viewer)

[idling fire]

Does anyone worry about plagiarism on this site? even with people getting 'really influenced' by ideas and techniques? It's just that there's no copyright protection when its on the net lol.

By other students for EE2 doesn't bother me, but do you mean in general? As in, one day you plan to publish your work, but some random can now steal your million-dollar idea? Although my idea is far from million-dollar quality, that would still really... suck.

Of the ones I've read:

Nichole - awesome. English teachers always seem to like literature about literature. I thought that kind of detracted from the 'death and loss' theme, but it worked well, considering that you didn't want it all emo and such. It reminded me (in a pleasant way) of one of the works in Showcase (04, I think...) Just Words.

Jimmayyy - great. Personal experience with the LSD trip? Not much to say about it, but it's good.

*thumbs up* Great work guys.

 

[Amez...]

View attachment 15285Here's mine i chose poetry i'd love feedback
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Poetry
Title: Beneath and Endless Canopy

 

[DownInFlames]

Everyone. Stop what you are doing. Stop.

I said STOP.

Go and read Nichole's Major Work right now.

It is a thing of brilliance. Wonderfully written, excellent voice and some great humour, not to mention some great connotations, eh Nichole?

Nichole, I award you 51.

I tried to read it but the link didn't work

 

[himmy6996]

The Art of Communication - CR

 

[kewlu]

The Art of Communication - CR

OMG A CRITICAL.

Thank you so much. I've been waiting for a fellow CRer to post.

EDIT: Well this is interesting. I'll make some detailed comments on it at the end but at the no punctuation dealie going on there.

At least you didn't write it lyk dizz.

 

[jimmayyy]

thanks a ton for the comments guys, greatly appreciated.

@ nicchole - yeah, Der Platz seemed like it influenced me, but i came across it pretty late in the process. it was more or less coincidental that it was similar to mine. the quote from Bogle just seemed to fit perfectly. hopefully, like you said, they don't take it was derivative, cus my MW was 95% finished when my mentor mentioned i should check her work out. the point i was making by talking about bogle's work was she was so good at the genii loci effect, something i had previously resolved to try and use.

kewlu: awesome work man - way to take an such a unique topic to the next level. crits can usually fail when they try and go with an outlandish analysis but you kept it going real well. kept a sophisticated by easy to read voice and a great conclusion. i hope you are rewarded well man

holden4ever: what a great concept. some of the formatting threw me (but take that with a gain of salt, i'm into "regular" poetry haha) but drawing the references between the effects of positive and negative powers and use of street signs was great. ill have to read the text you kept referencing, sounds pretty interesting.


im getting onto everyone else, be patient

 

[daniel592]

Gday

I've just read the 'Art of Communication'. Well done and I don't think you took a risk. It will still be impressive and appreciated by someone who isn't familiar with the Antin talk style poetry. My teacher is a bit of a pomo man and got a few kids in my ext 1 class really into his style, so i wasn't shocked by the 'talk' response. But yeah, i've read your CR and the it's original, well researched and interesting - voice is one of the most important thing I think.

This one bloke in my class (ext 2), did a straight down the line Marlow and Shakespeare CR thing, I mean, he'll probably end up in the top band, but it was boring. The voice just wasn't there. Yours is original in both content and style. I love your challenge of Barthes and your communication model. Well, best of luck for it.. Perhaps even showcase.

Here's mine, it's a short story. Enjoy if you get the chance. I'm happy with it and that's what matters.

 

[kewlu]

I wish I had a mentor.

Would have been very cool.

 

[jimmayyy]

Re: BoS 2007 Major Works - Post Here.

Jim, what's with the secret Wikipedia links in your work?

ahh i thought i formatted them all out. probably from when i copied and pasted a quote over to my major work and didn't clear the formatting. where abouts are they?

faceface: real engaging voice. some powerful lines:
"I would have killed the baby anyway, you know." i really could get into the detatched matter of fact style recitation, i dig works like that. your enjambment is great too: "Because the last thing I heard I was going to be by myself forever, and I was fine, and I was shut, and I made sense to myself and noone else". good work.

 

[kewlu]

Re: BoS 2007 Major Works - Post Here.

ahh i thought i formatted them all out. probably from when i copied and pasted a quote over to my major work and didn't clear the formatting. where abouts are they?

faceface: real engaging voice. some powerful lines:
"I would have killed the baby anyway, you know." i really could get into the detatched matter of fact style recitation, i dig works like that. your enjambment is great too: "Because the last thing I heard I was going to be by myself forever, and I was fine, and I was shut, and I made sense to myself and noone else". good work.

A couple of dates near the start.

 

[holden4ever89]

jimmayyy - thanks mate, yer the layout is tricky to follow unless its on paper - it works better that way

YEAH! another poet - go AMEZ

just started reading now, i already like it alot

 

[holden4ever89]

Diversity​

5:13 pm: An elderly, colour-blind man keeps a crossword to show his children


wow wow wow

the most unique, brillant poem i have read in a long long time

and i have read lots

 

[bento]

By other students for EE2 doesn't bother me, but do you mean in general? As in, one day you plan to publish your work, but some random can now steal your million-dollar idea? Although my idea is far from million-dollar quality, that would still really... suck.

Yeah that's pretty much what I meant...not that mine would be published either lol...
It obviously doesn't matter as much if EE2 people get influenced because you're not competing against them...its more about integrity and losing your uniqueness because someone else has no integrity lol

 

[bento]

Hey Jimmayy!
Interesting work...I haven't even finished reading it yet but it's cool!

Just wondering, why did you choose to write in first person? Sorry, I'm not trying to be critical, its just that when the guy's on acid he seems very aware of what's happening, (unlike an acid trip) because of the great narrative voice you have...but I think having an actual narrator would have portrayed his bizarre experiences more realistically, do you know what I mean?

You don't have to agree of course...I think I'm just influenced by my teacher who is really fussy about when people use fist person lol

 

[kewlu]

Hey Jimmayy!
Interesting work...I haven't even finished reading it yet but it's cool!

Just wondering, why did you choose to write in first person? Sorry, I'm not trying to be critical, its just that when the guy's on acid he seems very aware of what's happening, (unlike an acid trip) because of the great narrative voice you have...but I think having an actual narrator would have portrayed his bizarre experiences more realistically, do you know what I mean?

You don't have to agree of course...I think I'm just influenced by my teacher who is really fussy about when people use fist person lol

I'm going to throw an opinion in here.

I like the use of first person in this perspective, as it gives a better insight into the LSD-affected thoughts of the protaginist.

 

[bento]

I'm going to throw an opinion in here.

I like the use of first person in this perspective, as it gives a better insight into the LSD-affected thoughts of the protaginist.

I mean it sounds like a narrator is talking about what he's experiencing because the narrative voice is philosophical and articulate...for instance, if you were on LSD everything would be a blur of significance to you but you wouldn't be able to express it with definite metaphors and similes and personification.

Sorry Jimmayy if I sound critical, I'm not trying to be lol. I think its just because you've written in such an interesting way that it can be interpreted differently by different people. By the way, I knew you were influenced by Fear and Loathing, its so awesome! have you seen the movie?
Also, how come you didnt use an current or ex-acid user for a mentor? that would have been interesting...

Great work anyhow! I love the part about the doors being bastards, its so funny.

 

[Amez...]

Thanks holden4ever89. i hope u enjoyed it all. yOu know wat i love the most about urs? that u use an iinterest in cars and evoke such splendid imagery and metaphor in such an interesting way. and ur interest in ACDC is also weaved throughout i noticed too! tahts wat poetry should be tho so thats awseom. i loved mary's poppin pills and the way u use the signs. v. effective.

 

[himmy6996]

Thanks for the comments mate, still feel like its a risk and so on but glad you had a good reaction.

I read yours to the end even though I am busy because its BRILLIANT!! Love the chaotic world and you have a very advanced writing style, I wish I could write creative like that I usually go over the top wit adjectives and stuff but yours was perfect. Danny and Sophia have a really tangible fragile relationship Ilove it.

+++ Your use of intertexts was great, I really like a lot of the music you were using and Jeff Buckley was a classy element, particularly the theme of Grace. Hopefully you get as positive feedback from everyone else, well done man.

 

[kewlu]

ChicShit: I really liked your story. I love your use of language, and the poetic theme that runs throughout. The story in itself is great, I really like the parallel plots meeting as one in the end: I had that idea myself when I was originally doing a Short Story. Your narrative voice is engaging and I didn't take my eyes off the piece until the end.

Congratulations; you did a great job.

 

[WTF!bbq]

Okay, here we go:

Title: Do Ants Have Feelings?
Medium: Short Story

Aaaah I love it

ETA: OK, after reading through my ridiculous story a few times I've decided to put it up, let me make some excuses first though: I probably should have done a CR, its the type of writing-ness I'm better at, but I'd never actually stuck through with a short story till the end (I tended to reject them after like 5 pages) so I thought, it's something new, I'll give it a shot. Obviously not the best thing to do when you've got 10 units but hey ^__^

Title: Pinecones and Apple Orchards
Medium: Short story
Reflection statement at end of doc