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How to make friends at uni (2 Viewers)

sharoooooo

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It sounds so sad, but its true.
No one from my school is planning to attend the same uni as me. I have so many questions.

How easy/hard is it to make friends at uni?
Are there like 'get to know you' activities at O Week?
At O Week, how do you meet people who are doing your course and have the same timetable as you?
What can i do at O week (or anytime at uni) to get friends?
Do we get a map?

This is so nerveracking,..
And also, can other uni students tell who the 1st year students are?
 

Aysce

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I also went to uni that no one else from my school attended and to top it off, was (and still am) a really shy person so I understand how you feel.

Just from my experiences:

1. Easy if you're willing to strike up conversation with people sitting in lectures or waiting outside the lecture theatre.
2. Yes
3. There may be some events held 'exclusively' for people of a certain degree. It is hard to find someone with the same timetable as you unless they're doing the same core units
4. In my experience, I just went to the events and started talking with people there. I am quite a shy person but I found actively starting conversations rather than waiting for someone to approach me was the better way to make friends.
5. Yes
6. Not really. Maybe in the first few weeks but after that, nope (I can usually tell if one is a 1st year based on how afraid, lost and flamboyantly dressed they are in the first few weeks :haha:).

Hope this helped :)
 
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Katsumi

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It sounds so sad, but its true.
No one from my school is planning to attend the same uni as me. I have so many questions.
It's not sad at all, it's an honest question that goes through most peoples mind before university really. I remember having the same anxieties before uni started and i began forging my own experiences.

People from my highschool attended the same university as me, yet i haven't talked to any of them for a period of more than 5 minutes out of an intentional bid to cut all contact with my highschool friends.

How easy/hard is it to make friends at uni?
This really depends on an infinite amount of factors based on you as a person, it's important to remember that friendship is far from a static numbers game. However, on a basic level, it's actually quite easy to make friends at university provided that you are willing to be assertive and put yourself out there. The main disparency between the social context of university and highschool is that nobody is forced to be together and that nobody has a specific reason to stay around you if they don't want to. In this respect, if you want to make friends you simply have to be assertive and establish relationships of 50/50 ("Tug and Pull") effort between parties. Despite this being 50/50, it will largely be 100% you at the beginning. In the early days of my first semester nobody actually just upped and approached me, i put in initiative and had a hell of a lot of fun doing it (and at the same time, grew immensely as a person) and kinda suggest that you try and do the same.

So in a simplified manner. It's both easy and hard to make friends at uni. If you show initiative and have good intentions you will make friends quite easily (I have more friends in University than i ever did in highschool). Whereas if you simply sit there and expect people to flock to you i could see you having difficulties. Though through making this thread it seems that you are starting to form the right idea.

Are there like 'get to know you' activities at O Week?
Yeah, these were a lot of fun. That's all the merit i can give them though, you won't really see those people again outside of possibly classes if you don't want to do so. I remember meeting 2 people at orientation that i thought were fun and formed a certain assignment group with them where we got to know eachother better. Apart from that i didn't really re-connect with anyone i met at orientation.

As opposed to relying on classes and orientation events (which is common in first year university students), if you want to go beyond the norms socially (having multiple circles of friends as opposed to 3 or 4 and becoming more extroverted) it is important to tap into all the opportunities university has to offer. With this lies my one main piece of advice i can possibly give you, put yourself out there, don't stay inside your comfort zone and learn to love the uncertainty of trying new things. You may just find that things that you found as weird, scary or otherwise intimidating will become your new favorite activities. I remember at clubs day back in February i thought the UTS anime club was a bit abstract and weird, i remember hesitating on whether to join or not when near the booth, but at one point i took the leap and figured "why the hell not". Fast forward almost half a year and before my internship commenced i was attending 3-4 events a week and had a large social circle of people that i had a connection with, even going as far as running for an executive position.

At O Week, how do you meet people who are doing your course and have the same timetable as you?
You don't, though the people running the event usually put people in the same courses/faculties together (I remember 'cause due to my course having only 36 people i was the only one without any coursemates on the day :lol:). If you like someone that you meet connect with them on facebook and ask if they want to sync timetables, you'll find that more often than not they will say yes. A lot of first year students are just as, if not more nervous than you and this shines through when making friendships. Act on your desires and remember that you're no longer a child and don't need to do things so covertly. Just be overt about it and ask.

What can i do at O week (or anytime at uni) to get friends?
This largely depends on your own interests and hobbies. Tbh i have met people in the most weird and abstract ways since i started university so to an extent you really don't know what to expect. But at a basic level

  • Look into and attend clubs (If you're @ UTS then i suggest joining Anime@UTS if you're interested in that stuff)
  • Sit next to and chat with people in lectures and tutorials. After that class, ask if they want to connect on facebook and keep in touch.
  • Attend society and university run events
  • Grab a few drinks at your respective uni bar and chat with some people
  • Attend BoS meets if you're open to that, we have a few every year and let's just say that BoS has been one of my main uni social circles this year (and i have a fair lot of them).

Everything beyond that is subject to your own experiences and actions in the moment really.

Do we get a map?
If we're talking UNSW, yes. I went to their O-Week despite studying at UTS and they hand out maps at the information desks which are plentiful.

And also, can other uni students tell who the 1st year students are?
In the initial stages of university, yes. Rule of thumb is to look for the most angsty bunch in the room and you're usually right. But in all honesty who really cares what year they're in, i personally find that hanging out with those in later years as less static and more socially stimulating. Emotional maturity far outweighs the physical so just approach and chat with anyone, irrespective of year.


So yeah

xoxo
 

sharoooooo

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wooooo :)
Thanks everyone
Doesn't seem too tough, just gotta join clubs and be out there and talk to people :)
 
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Focus on your HSC - now is not the time to be thinking about how to make friends at uni or anything of that sort.

Focus on HSC.

You have like 4 months of holidays afterwards to figure all this stuff out.
 

sharoooooo

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Focus on your HSC - now is not the time to be thinking about how to make friends at uni or anything of that sort.

Focus on HSC.

You have like 4 months of holidays afterwards to figure all this stuff out.
thats true ;)
 

Shadowdude

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It sounds so sad, but its true.
No one from my school is planning to attend the same uni as me. I have so many questions.

How easy/hard is it to make friends at uni?
Are there like 'get to know you' activities at O Week?
At O Week, how do you meet people who are doing your course and have the same timetable as you?
What can i do at O week (or anytime at uni) to get friends?
Do we get a map?

This is so nerveracking,..
And also, can other uni students tell who the 1st year students are?
what uni are you thinking of going to


also i was the only one from my school that went to unsw - just forced me to make friends
 

anomalousdecay

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Join societies and make friends with class mates doing the same program as you!
 

OzKo

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Keep in mind that there's loads of people in the same boat as you.

The first few weeks of uni should be the easiest time to make friends.
 

sharoooooo

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Not only just O-week but all of your years at uni!

Heck I'm still making friends now. It really never ends if you are constantly trying.
oh okay :)
Idk cuz i've heard from others that whoever you meet in the first few weeks are usually who you'll stick with forever hahaa :p and if you don't meet anyone, you're screwed D:
 

anomalousdecay

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oh okay :)
Idk cuz i've heard from others that whoever you meet in the first few weeks are usually who you'll stick with forever hahaa :p and if you don't meet anyone, you're screwed D:
Well the "others" obviously were not up for making new friends outside of O-week or the first few weeks.

Uni is not like high school at all. I mean sure many people are doing their own separate thing and whatsoever, although many people are friendly enough to keep a conversation going if one generates.
 

Katsumi

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oh okay :)
Idk cuz i've heard from others that whoever you meet in the first few weeks are usually who you'll stick with forever hahaa :p and if you don't meet anyone, you're screwed D:
Tell whoever said that that they're completely wrong.
 

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