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You know you're a law student when: (1 Viewer)

Joined
Oct 18, 2007
Messages
729
Location
Newcastle
Gender
Male
HSC
2008
- Other students ask how you're going with an assessment 3 weeks before its due.

- You schedule outtings with friends weeks in advance so they don't conflict with cramming.

- You congregate together with other law students in your arts subjects.

- There's actually a macbook club in your class.

- A HC is a 'fail'.

- Classes are full of nerd lingo - 'it's over 9000!'.

- You go out drinking with your friends and find out later that night that they were nerds who got bullied all through highschool or were used for their notes. You'd lol but you're just as geeky yourself.

- You've heard the name 'Kirby J' for the millionth time (end of 1st week).

- There always is a 'magic textbook' for every assessment.


Additions?
 
Last edited:

hfis

Dyslexic Fish
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Aug 5, 2004
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876
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Not China
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Undisclosed
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Shamelessly lifted from the facebook group with a similar name:

You know all sorts of sneaky and creative ways to steal from clients thanks to your Professionalism and Ethics class.

You consider dropping out of law school approximately every hour, but after that first semester you realized you were already in too much debt to be anything other than a lawyer.

You aspire to one day own Blackacre.

Substance abuse becomes you.

The drama in your life now rivals that of high school.

You make adverse possession jokes.

You can name without hesitation at least three people who make you want to throw things when you see them raise their hands in class.

You are truly and deeply unnerved by the thought of some of your classmates becoming attorneys.

You think tequila shots are essential to ordered liberty.

You wonder if that one professor who always seems angry and irritable and treats students’ minds as his personal playground is actually a sociopath or just didn’t get enough hugs as a child.

You know and understand the complicated epistemological and metaphysical differences between a conspirator and an accomplice.

You know and understand the complicated epistemological and metaphysical differences between coffee and red bull.

You can’t remember if you decided to come to law school because you wanted to help people and make a difference in the world or because you hate yourself.

You think whoever first introduced the Socratic method into the law school curriculum should have his face lit on fire and then beaten out with a rake.

You can’t think of any legitimate reason why a law student would need access to certain public records, but you can think of a whole lot of illegitimate ones.

After the first semester you realized that “briefing a case” need only consist of looking it up on Lexis or Westlaw.

You’ve given yourself carpal tunnel from all the spider solitaire you play in class.

When someone is expressing their frustration or anger about something that is in any way related to the law, you can’t be sympathetic because you’re too busy figuring out in your head if they have a cause of action.

You hear about the death of an elderly friend or relative and wonder if they died intestate.

You have considered changing career paths to hot dog vendor, stilt walker, or career alcoholic.

You're pretty sure the reasonable prudent man is a friendless tool who still lives with his mother.
Mostly accurate!
 

chewy123

OAM, FAICD, FAAS, MBBS
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
849
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Male
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....your once bright and exuberant eyes now grows dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life.
 

TehAzner

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When you feel the wrath of 3 law assessments in one week.
 

tallkid34

In 25 words or less
Joined
Sep 3, 2005
Messages
1,124
Gender
Male
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....your once bright and exuberant eyes now grows dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life.
Drop law. It's shit. And it's making you depressed. No one will think any less of you.
 

Boxes

Banned
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....your once bright and exuberant eyes now grows dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life.
man, things on the internet usually don't sadden me, but this kinda did.

:(
 

Uncle

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The following questions from lawyers were taken from official court records nationwide. They were compiled by a client of the Salt Lake City law firm of Johnson & Hatch.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Was that the same nose you broke as a child?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: What happened then?

A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."

Q: Did he kill you?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Were you alone or by yourself?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Do you have any children or anything of that kind?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: So you were gone until you returned?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Texas attorney, realising he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I'd like to strike the next question."


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Now, you have investigated other murders, have you not, where there was a victim?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: ... and what did he do then?

A: He came home, and next morning he was dead.

Q: So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Probably the same lawyer who asked:

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Could you see him from where you were standing?

A: I could see his head.

Q: And where was his head?

A: Just above his shoulders.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: ... any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?

A: The victim lived.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Mrs. Jones, is your appearance this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

A: No. This is how I dress when I go to work.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Did he pick the dog up by the ears?

A: No.

Q: What was he doing with the dog's ears?

A: Picking them up in the air.

Q: Where was the dog at this time?

A: Attached to the ears.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: What is your relationship with the plaintiff?

A: She is my daughter.

Q: Was she your daughter on February 13 1979?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Did you stay all night with this man in New York?

A: I refuse to answer that question.

Q: Did you stay all night with this man in Chicago?

A: I refuse to answer that question.

Q: Did you stay all night with this man in Miami?

A: No.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death.

Q: And by whose death was it terminated?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: How did you happen to go to Dr. Cheney?

A: Well, a gal down by the road had had several of her children by Dr. Cheney and said he was really good.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are right now?

A: I will be three months November 8th.

Q: Apparently then, the date of conception was August 8th?

A: Yes.

Q: What were you and your husband doing at that time?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Mrs. Smith, you do believe that you are emotionally unstable?

A: I used to be.

Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

A: Four times.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A: All my autopsies have been on dead people.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Were you acquainted with the deceased?

A: Yes, sir.

Q: Before or after he died?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: You say you're innocent, yet five people swore they saw you steal a watch.

A: Your Honor, I can produce 500 people who didn't see me steal it.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?

Mr. BROOKS: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: At the time you first saw Dr. McCarty, had you ever seen him prior to that time?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Did the lady standing at the driveway subsequently identify herself to you?

A: Yes, she did.

Q: Who did she say she was?

A: She said she was the owner of the dog's wife.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: I understand you're Bernie Davis's mother.

A: Yes.

Q: How long have you known him?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Now, I'm going to show you what has been marked as State's Exhibit No. 2 and ask if you recognize the picture?

A: John Fletcher.

Q: That's you?

A: Yes, sir.

Q: And you were present when the picture was taken, right?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Please state the location of your right foot immediately prior to impact.

A: Immediately before the impact, my right foot was located at the immediate end of my right leg.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: She had three children, right?

A: Yes.

Q: How many were boys?

A: None.

Q: Were there girls?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?

A: Not yet.


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Q: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel?

A: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about 8:30pm.

Q: And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that correct?

A: No, you stupid [jerk], he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Before we recess, let's listen in on one last exchange - this one involving a child:

Q: And lastly, Gary, all your responses must be oral, OK?

A: Oral.

Q: How old are you?

A: Oral.
lolblog
 

melsc

Premium Member
Joined
Aug 17, 2004
Messages
6,365
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Chasing ambulances in the Inner West...
Gender
Female
HSC
2005
When someone says something you think of its legal use rather than every day use.

You start to use double negatives

You use double negatives but do not intend them to mean a postitive *cough* not insignificant*

You murder highlighters by over use

Your eye sight deminishes

You have an odd love for Kirby and feels as if he is dead to you now he is no longer on the High Court (but are secretly releaved that there are will be no more drawn out judgments).
 

TehAzner

Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
777
Gender
Male
HSC
N/A
When someone says something you think of its legal use rather than every day use.

You start to use double negatives

You use double negatives but do not intend them to mean a postitive *cough* not insignificant*

You murder highlighters by over use

Your eye sight deminishes

You have an odd love for Kirby and feels as if he is dead to you now he is no longer on the High Court (but are secretly releaved that there are will be no more drawn out judgments).
I love the highlighters and double negative ones :rofl::rofl:

And on a side note, has Kirby J become an honorary member of every single university faculty of law?? As far as I've heard he's part of both USYD and UNSW, not too sure about Macquarie...
 

circusmind

Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2007
Messages
330
Gender
Male
HSC
2006
I love the highlighters and double negative ones :rofl::rofl:

And on a side note, has Kirby J become an honorary member of every single university faculty of law?? As far as I've heard he's part of both USYD and UNSW, not too sure about Macquarie...
ANU as well.
 

nrs1990

Member
Joined
Feb 13, 2006
Messages
99
Gender
Female
HSC
2008
You try to identify contractual offer and acceptance when you buy petrol.

You consider the legal situation of offensive language in public whenever anyone uses the f-word.

Your first response when someone does something annoying or immoral is "sue them".

You try to come up with a legal argument for why your stepfather shouldn't sing in the kitchen. (Offensive conduct within hearing of a public place? Unjust enrichment in terms of his happiness at your expense? Negligence?)

You start to use the phrase "objection" in an ordinary, non-legal argument.

When your mother agrees to pay your little sister $2 to do some dusting, you think about how its not contractually binding since there's a presumption parties don't intend to be legally bound in a family relationship (and because your sister is a minor).
 

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