which guy? (1 Viewer)

[chickaaaa]

Ok so I noe this isn't the best place to get advice but I need some help. This is my situation.
I have been friends with this guy for ages now. We r pretty good friends and we get along heaps good. So anyway for the past few months I have wanted to be more then friends with him but I am totally sure than he never wants to be more then friends with me. i think I might of made it obvious to him (not on purpose) and he might noe that i like him. I just keep pretending like its the same as always. But the truth is i like him SO much.

Anyway now I kind of have a chance with another guy. I don't know him but he is a friend of a friend, and my friend tells me that he is pretty keen and interested. but i'm really not motivated. i just keep hoping that something will happen with the first guy even though i noe nothing will ever happen. what should i do? im scared that i'll be being slack to this new guy if i make him think there is a chance when my heart is with someone else

 

[Skittled]

im scared that i'll be being slack to this new guy if i make him think there is a chance when my heart is with someone else

What're you looking for? Love, or Someone to get with? If you're looking for a meaningful relationship, --in my experience-- you can't just create it with someone who shows interest.

Hate to be cynical or overly blunt, but it sounds like you know what you've got to do, already.

 

[thorrnydevil]

Ok so I noe this isn't the best place to get advice but I need some help. This is my situation.
I have been friends with this guy for ages now. We r pretty good friends and we get along heaps good. So anyway for the past few months I have wanted to be more then friends with him but I am totally sure than he never wants to be more then friends with me. i think I might of made it obvious to him (not on purpose) and he might noe that i like him. I just keep pretending like its the same as always. But the truth is i like him SO much.

Anyway now I kind of have a chance with another guy. I don't know him but he is a friend of a friend, and my friend tells me that he is pretty keen and interested. but i'm really not motivated. i just keep hoping that something will happen with the first guy even though i noe nothing will ever happen. what should i do? im scared that i'll be being slack to this new guy if i make him think there is a chance when my heart is with someone else

Re: Ladder Theory

The guy is probably interested, but he just wants to fuck you rather than date you.

Anyway, try your luck on the first guy and if it falls through go for the second.

 

[chickaaaa]

What're you looking for? Love, or Someone to get with? If you're looking for a meaningful relationship, --in my experience-- you can't just create it with someone who shows interest.

Hate to be cynical or overly blunt, but it sounds like you know what you've got to do, already.

yeah i noe that... about the meaningful relationship. i guess im just wondering if i should take the time to get to know this guy. maybe in the future it could develop into something?
Skittled, i really don't noe what to do. its just that my feelings for my friend are so strong, i noe that i would never really give this new guy a chance nomatter how hard i try.

 

[thorrnydevil]

chickaaa-I feel you should know that 'know' is spelt like this, not 'noe'.

Please correct it. Thank you.

 

[pmr_123]

well if the first guy isn't interested in being more than jsut frienes, be grateful that you are friends and don't ruin that relationship by constantly trying to be with him...

see what the second guy is like, no obligations, just be friends with him for a while and see if you're interested... you don't know him so you may just like him

 

[anarchron]

Sounds quite complicated. It really depends on the dynamics of the situation.

One thing for certain is that you will end up in a heap of mess if you continually be friends with the first guy who shows no interest in you and end up with the other guy. It is either one or the other. Human nature is such that we lust for the forbidden fruit, the unacheivable. You will be full of whatifs or whatnots.

Ok so I noe this isn't the best place to get advice but I need some help. This is my situation.
I have been friends with this guy for ages now. We r pretty good friends and we get along heaps good. So anyway for the past few months I have wanted to be more then friends with him but I am totally sure than he never wants to be more then friends with me. i think I might of made it obvious to him (not on purpose) and he might noe that i like him. I just keep pretending like its the same as always. But the truth is i like him SO much.

Anyway now I kind of have a chance with another guy. I don't know him but he is a friend of a friend, and my friend tells me that he is pretty keen and interested. but i'm really not motivated. i just keep hoping that something will happen with the first guy even though i noe nothing will ever happen. what should i do? im scared that i'll be being slack to this new guy if i make him think there is a chance when my heart is with someone else

 

[SweetSeasons]

The guy I always wanted to be with, didn't want to be with me until to late. He still confuses me and I wish I had never met him at times. I'm with a really great guy, who I do have strong feelings for, but there's always this other guy who continualy makes my mind a mess.
I always feel guilty, like I'm cheating on my bf or something, which I would never do because I do love him, I love him so much I feel like I should dump him because if he found out that this other guy kept comming into my mind he would be he would be hurt. And being with my bf is hurting this other guy.
I feel like no matter which way I go some one is getting hurt.

So my advice is be friends with this new guy, don't lead him on, take a risk with the guy you like if you get hurt, at least it's only you getting hurt not any one else. That's what you would do, if you really didn't want to hurt any one. Cause you will end up hurting this new guy if you go with him.

 

[chickaaaa]

chickaaa-I feel you should know that 'know' is spelt like this, not 'noe'.

Please correct it. Thank you.

I noe But if i wanted advice on spelling, i woulda gone to the english thread.

well if the first guy isn't interested in being more than jsut frienes, be grateful that you are friends and don't ruin that relationship by constantly trying to be with him...

see what the second guy is like, no obligations, just be friends with him for a while and see if you're interested... you don't know him so you may just like him

easier said than done though. it's so hard talking to this guy every day, liking him so much and knowing (happy, thorrnydevil?) that nothing will ever happen.
but i guess i might give this other guy a go. will he be all pissed off i say "look im not looking for anything at the moment, so lets just be friends" ?

Sounds quite complicated. It really depends on the dynamics of the situation.

One thing for certain is that you will end up in a heap of mess if you continually be friends with the first guy who shows no interest in you and end up with the other guy. It is either one or the other. Human nature is such that we lust for the forbidden fruit, the unacheivable. You will be full of whatifs or whatnots.

Yeah that's exactly what i mean... deep down im probably actually hoping that my friend will get jealous if something happens with the other guy. you know what i mean? dont you just HATE false hope?!

 

[datAsianGuy]

Hhmmmm..... time for Azn Sensation.... lol. look. If you get yourself tied up too hard with the new guy who shows interest, you'll just find yourself torn.... and that will be very sucky for you. On the other hand however, dont let yourself be drawn away from the guy you 'really' like, because you'lll lose something... I garuntee it.... (Robert smells) yeah... im not much help.... torn sucks.... I know.... Im there also

maybe I could complicate things: 0431 65319

 

[chickaaaa]

The guy I always wanted to be with, didn't want to be with me until to late. He still confuses me and I wish I had never met him at times. I'm with a really great guy, who I do have strong feelings for, but there's always this other guy who continualy makes my mind a mess.
I always feel guilty, like I'm cheating on my bf or something, which I would never do because I do love him, I love him so much I feel like I should dump him because if he found out that this other guy kept comming into my mind he would be he would be hurt. And being with my bf is hurting this other guy.
I feel like no matter which way I go some one is getting hurt.

So my advice is be friends with this new guy, don't lead him on, take a risk with the guy you like if you get hurt, at least it's only you getting hurt not any one else. That's what you would do, if you really didn't want to hurt any one. Cause you will end up hurting this new guy if you go with him.

see this is what im scared might happen to me. i might end up liking the new guy but i dont really see myself getting over the one anytime soon, esp since we talk every day.

and as datAsianGuy said... i dont wanna just let him go because he is so awesome.

(Robert smells) yeah... im not much help.... torn sucks.... I know.... Im there also

maybe I could complicate things: 0431 65319

Who is robert, and you left out a number
Kidding!

 

[datAsianGuy]

Who is robert, and you left out a number
Kidding!

oh... robert is my astronaut friend (astronaught because he is such a space tripper... ok, i know thats a really poor joke) oh and my number is 0431 656 319 lol

 

[Frigid]

when in doubt, flip a coin. at least then you know it's fair to both of them.

it won't hurt your conscience because whatever happens will be an act of God.

 

[thorrnydevil]

I noe But if i wanted advice on spelling, i woulda gone to the english thread.

It wasn't advice. I was telling you to change it. There is a difference

easier said than done though. it's so hard talking to this guy every day, liking him so much and knowing (happy, thorrnydevil?) that nothing will ever happen.
but i guess i might give this other guy a go. will he be all pissed off i say "look im not looking for anything at the moment, so lets just be friends" ?

Why the fuck would I be happy? It's rather depressing you lack the confidence to ask some person if they like you. You don't KNOW nothing will ever happen (unless you're extremely ugly), so get some courage and ask him.

 

[llamalope]

Ok so I noe this isn't the best place to get advice but I need some help. This is my situation.
I have been friends with this guy for ages now. We r pretty good friends and we get along heaps good. So anyway for the past few months I have wanted to be more then friends with him but I am totally sure than he never wants to be more then friends with me. i think I might of made it obvious to him (not on purpose) and he might noe that i like him. I just keep pretending like its the same as always. But the truth is i like him SO much.

Anyway now I kind of have a chance with another guy. I don't know him but he is a friend of a friend, and my friend tells me that he is pretty keen and interested. but i'm really not motivated. i just keep hoping that something will happen with the first guy even though i noe nothing will ever happen. what should i do? im scared that i'll be being slack to this new guy if i make him think there is a chance when my heart is with someone else

I was in your exact situation. I chose the guy who asked me out, but i wasn't really into but we had fun, then about 1 month into the relationship I realised that i was in love with the other guy, so i broke up, and then 1 month later, me and my best guy friend were going out.



Do what your heart tells you to

 

[chickaaaa]

I was in your exact situation. I chose the guy who asked me out, but i wasn't really into but we had fun, then about 1 month into the relationship I realised that i was in love with the other guy, so i broke up, and then 1 month later, me and my best guy friend were going out.



Do what your heart tells you to

my heart tells me to stick with the first guy... but im scared that if i tell him how i feel, it will ruin the friendship. i know it sounds really cliche, but its true. and then i think that if nothing ever happens between us, and i never even tried with the other guy, then i might of lost something that coulda been great. argggggghhhhhhhh

 

[SweetSeasons]

if you never try with the first guy, nothign great will ever happen with the 1st or with the 2nd

 

[05er]

Just one thing: FUCK*THEM*ALL!

 

[sparkl3z]

what's so good about sex...lol.....i don't see why people are so obsessed with it.....life is not sex people!!!

 

[llamalope]

my heart tells me to stick with the first guy... but im scared that if i tell him how i feel, it will ruin the friendship. i know it sounds really cliche, but its true. and then i think that if nothing ever happens between us, and i never even tried with the other guy, then i might of lost something that coulda been great. argggggghhhhhhhh

"you can't lose by loving, only by holding back" (what a cliche)

If I hadn't told my best guy friend (half jokingly, but i actually meant it) that i had a huge crush on him, he said he would have never had the courage to tell me he'd liked me for two years.