Thesis outline (1 Viewer)

[Steyene]

I just need some people to bounce this off.

Main Points:
1 .* Belonging to people and places.
2 .* Not belonging.
3 .* The lengths that people go too to belong.
4. * What happens when you actually belong.

Texts:
Crucible - A. Miller
Lyrics of "Not One Of Us"- Peter Gabriel
Cartoon "Globalization" - Leunig
Episode 8 of Life on Mars(BBC) 2007- Directed by Matthew Graham and Tony Jordan

Links between texts:

The Crucible:
Includes points 1->4. Point one initially demonstrated by John Proctor, in that he belongs to the community via land and respect.

Point two is shown through Reverend Paris, who doesn't belong in the rural community because of his education and where he is from. He also demostrates point three to a certain degree.

Point three is clearly shown through Abigail, Tituba and Betty Paris. All who name names in order to belong to the community.

Point four is shown through Abigail, where she gains enormous power over the community because she belongs to a select group, which grants her the ability to name names.

Not one of Us:
Includes points 2->4

Point two is shown via the target being told that they don't belong, and is repeatedly told that they aren't "One of Us".

Point 3 is shown via the lyric "You may look like we do Talk like we do". They have tried to assimilate but they still don't belong.

Point 4 is shown via the artist's ability to state that the target doesn't belong

Globalization:
Points 1,2 &4

In this cartoon, Leunig shows what happens when you belong to everything. You belong to nothing.

LoM(BBC)
Points 1->3

Shown via Sam wanting to return to where he belongs, and the power he then gains.

Techniques:
The Crucible
*Dramatic Irony: We know that Abigail isn't as innocent as the town thinks she is. Hales realization that it is all over the top. A. Millers commentry on the Communist witch hunts.
* Language: Shows us to what group the person belongs to and the time that they inhabit.
*Stage Directions: Helps emphasize which people belong and the ones that don't

Not One Of Us:
*Repeatition. Emphasizes that an outsider doesn't belong.
*Simile "It is only water in a strangers tear". That outsiders don't matter. That they don't cry real tears.
*Cliche "There's safety in numbers When you learn to divide" That being in a group grants power and allows you to single out others.

Globalization:
*Posture. The main figure is slumped against a wall with only his head touching the wall, signifying that he has given up.
*Text. Explains the figures ideas of belonging.
*Forgrounding, shows that the main figure doesn't belong

LoM:
*Mise-en-scene. Through the use of clothing and props, it shows where Sam Tyler really belongs.
*Camera Angles. The high shot before his navarda moment disempowers him, then the low shot afterwards empowers him and strengthen the sense of his belonging.
*Monolog. Show clearly what Tyler is thinking in regards to what he is going to do in regards to trying to belong.

Please if anyone could C&C this outline it would be greatly appreciated, along with any tips or pointers.

This is for Advance English Paper 1 question 3.

 

[Steyene]

Bump, please could some people comment.

 

[Revelation]

i am homosexual

 

[Steyene]

Okay, some one who isn't being a prat.

 

[I.refuse.a.name]

I just need some people to bounce this off.

Main Points:
1 .* Belonging to people and places.
2 .* Not belonging.
3 .* The lengths that people go too to belong.
4. * What happens when you actually belong.

Texts:
Crucible - A. Miller
Lyrics of "Not One Of Us"- Peter Gabriel
Cartoon "Globalization" - Leunig
Episode 8 of Life on Mars(BBC) 2007- Directed by Matthew Graham and Tony Jordan

Links between texts:

The Crucible:
Includes points 1->4. Point one initially demonstrated by John Proctor, in that he belongs to the community via land and respect.

Point two is shown through Reverend Paris, who doesn't belong in the rural community because of his education and where he is from. He also demostrates point three to a certain degree.

Point three is clearly shown through Abigail, Tituba and Betty Paris. All who name names in order to belong to the community.

Point four is shown through Abigail, where she gains enormous power over the community because she belongs to a select group, which grants her the ability to name names.

Not one of Us:
Includes points 2->4

Point two is shown via the target being told that they don't belong, and is repeatedly told that they aren't "One of Us".

Point 3 is shown via the lyric "You may look like we do Talk like we do". They have tried to assimilate but they still don't belong.

Point 4 is shown via the artist's ability to state that the target doesn't belong

Globalization:
Points 1,2 &4

In this cartoon, Leunig shows what happens when you belong to everything. You belong to nothing.

LoM(BBC)
Points 1->3

Shown via Sam wanting to return to where he belongs, and the power he then gains.

Techniques:
The Crucible
*Dramatic Irony: We know that Abigail isn't as innocent as the town thinks she is. Hales realization that it is all over the top. A. Millers commentry on the Communist witch hunts.
* Language: Shows us to what group the person belongs to and the time that they inhabit.
*Stage Directions: Helps emphasize which people belong and the ones that don't

Not One Of Us:
*Repeatition. Emphasizes that an outsider doesn't belong.
*Simile "It is only water in a strangers tear". That outsiders don't matter. That they don't cry real tears.
*Cliche "There's safety in numbers When you learn to divide" That being in a group grants power and allows you to single out others.

Globalization:
*Posture. The main figure is slumped against a wall with only his head touching the wall, signifying that he has given up.
*Text. Explains the figures ideas of belonging.
*Forgrounding, shows that the main figure doesn't belong

LoM:
*Mise-en-scene. Through the use of clothing and props, it shows where Sam Tyler really belongs.
*Camera Angles. The high shot before his navarda moment disempowers him, then the low shot afterwards empowers him and strengthen the sense of his belonging.
*Monolog. Show clearly what Tyler is thinking in regards to what he is going to do in regards to trying to belong.

Please if anyone could C&C this outline it would be greatly appreciated, along with any tips or pointers.

This is for Advance English Paper 1 question 3.

Sorry the only text of yours I've read is the Crucible (an I think I watched a couple of minutes of a Life on Mars episode), so I'm having some difficulty understanding your points and process to comment- any way you could make it clearer? It might just be me though.

Make sure your related texts work effectively with your thesis - what exactly is it btw? I see you have paragraph headings but do you have an overall general feel for what Belonging is about in regards to the Crucible and your related texts, which are guiding what you express in your main points? Whilst having extra related texts is a very good idea for back up, I think you should use the minimum requested (i.e. usually 2 not 3) so you can improve the quality of your analysis - depth is better in this case than having less detail for more texts.

I thought teachers in Marking centres felt Leunig was overused (but if you think you can analyse it insanely well then maybe it doesn't matter), and if you're going to do a song make sure you can analyse both the lyrics and the musical composition in order to demonstrate belonging/not belonging.

I don't know if I'd entirely agree that Parris doesn't belong due to his rural upbringing and where is he from - what's your specific textual evidence for this opinion because I can't remember that stuff off the top of my head (having said that I could be wrong)? I would personally think in part it's his obsession with self and reputation inhibiting his inability to belong with others, despite having power over others from his position as a religious leader in a theocratic community.

Make sure all your points can be backed up by textual evidence. In the Leunig cartoon where you say belonging to everything is actually belonging to nothing, are you using this as an ironic statement? Does this demonstrate something about the need to choose allegiances or a sense of belonging with some environments or people over others or something? Make sure your structure works for you and is a logical progression of ideas about belonging or not belonging, that help you argue an overall perspective on Belonging that can be summed up in 1 - 3 sentences (i.e. your thesis). Also make sure your related texts contribute to the sophistication of your essay. Hope that helps

 

[Ann Fisher]

It would be really helpful if you broke up that huge slab of text with a couple of paragraphs. Thanks anyway, will use this with my student.

@OP: My student is doing the same stuff, will reply with comments if I can get anything useful